


My heart stays with you

by Enid_Nightshade1803



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-08
Updated: 2020-04-28
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:53:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23541895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Enid_Nightshade1803/pseuds/Enid_Nightshade1803
Summary: What would you do if you meet the person who got the heart your fiancée donated after she died?Would you feel it? How would you react?Ps: I totally support organs donation, we could save lives mates.
Relationships: LaFontaine/Lola Perry, Laura Hollis/Carmilla Karnstein
Comments: 17
Kudos: 29





	1. Chapter 1

"People die all the time. Illness, accidents, of olds. And life goes on, the world doesn't stop just because a person dies" she mutters "People die all the time but that doesn't mean the ones who stay alive can get over it, sometimes they stop living and they just...exist. Their grief don't go away and they live of memories that once made them happy, they live questioning all the 'what if's' in order to know why the people they love passed away, why they couldn't have a closure. And sometimes, sometimes their pain can't let their deads Rest In Peace" Ell sighs "I'm sure that's why I'm here, to let you know that I'm ok and you don't have to mourn me anymore" Ell says but Carmilla can't hear her voice anymore so the only thing Ell can do is looking at the girl she loves sobbing sourly before falling asleep the day before the first anniversary of her dead.  
  
****  
  
"Hi dad how it's going?" Laura answers her phone while trying to find her car keys.  
"Hi honey I'm fine thank you. What about you?" He says  
"Great dad" she says cheerfully "I'm about to have dinner with Laf and Perry though" she adds  
"Right! I was calling to ask you if we can meet tomorrow for lunch Laura- bear?" His voice a little nervous "of course dad is it ok at 1:00 pm in Sabatini's? I want pasta for a change is that ok?" She says  
"Of course sweetheart! I love pasta" her father replies  
"Ok.awesome. Uh dad? I gotta go. See you tomorrow ok? Love you!" She says  
"Tomorrow then honey. Love you too" he says before hanging up  
Laura sighs "tomorrow...it's been a year since I have you" she mutters while touching the scar on her chest.  
  
****  
"The silent can be peaceful in here you know? but I don't think you'd like it...I remember you filling the room with your laugh and your voice when you asked me to wake up before kissing my forehead. Fuck I miss your voice Ell and you don't know how painful is getting home where there's nothing but silence" Carmilla wipes a tear as it goes down through her cheek standing in front of the grave belonging to her fiancée.  
"I know love, I know" Ell replies failing to touch the tear in Carmilla's cheek "that's why I'm here to be with you...I'll be always here" she says  
  
****  
Laura is waving at her father as she gets to the restaurant. She's in gray jeans and dark blue sweater with a big whit owl in the middle.  
"Hello darling" her father greets her with a bear hug "how are you today?" He asks  
"I'm alright dad, everything's ok. You?" She says  
"I'm perfect now I finally see you" he says while he smiles "it's been almost a month since we've met last time" he complains  
"Yeah, well now that the classes are starting I had to organize my lessons" she explains "you know I wanna be prepare for the school year, I don't want anyone to think I can't deal with this" she laughs nervously "I don't want anyone to think I'm still sick and they start treating me like another kid" she sighs.  
"Don't say that honey" her father says "and if they do that it's because they care about you. You should be happy for that" he adds  
"I know they care about me as much as I care about them but that doesn't mean they have to treat like a toddler. I know I was sick for a long time and they had to treat me like a porcelain doll that could be broken at anytime" She says "but dad I'm ok now! I've been ok for a year. No trouble at breathing or pain in my chest. Nothing, finally I can have a normal life just like anyone else" She looks at his eyes "I can do things I couldn't when my heart was weak and I could barely walk" she flashbacks how her life was before the transplant.  
"Well pumpkin if their behavior bother you then you should tell them" he advises  
"I've told them already but you know Danny, she's overprotective and she's always asking me if everything's ok" She sighs "she's a good person and one of my best friends but It doesn't matter how many times I say that I'm alright she keeps treating me like something is about to break" she take a deep breath feeling a heat forming in her eyes "and Perry has this 'Mom-Mode' and if I don't answer my phone she keeps calling at least Laf knows that I'm not comfortable with this and tries to give me space and time to be by myself" she wipes a tear that is falling through her left cheek "and I'm not crying because I'm sad. I'm happy dad, I live, knowing how many people don't have the luck I had when they found a healthy heart for me. I'm crying because it's frustrating that my best friends don't let me have a normal life" she sobs "I know they love me but this love is asphyxiating me" her dad squeezes her hand and give her an apologetic look.  
"Laura, you know better than anyone that as a father I wanna protect you for everything and sometimes I can overstep in my job as a parent but I do it because I love you so much and now that you've said this I realize that maybe I was wrong, maybe I should give you more space and let you to live with life as you want to" he explains "that's why my only advice is to have this conversation with your friends the same way you just told me because darling, you deserve it" he smiles "you deserve the world" he adds  
"Thanks dad! I needed to hear this" she says "I'll talk to them" she sighs  
"Ok! Now what do you think we order pasta I'm starving" he laughs  
"I agree" She laughs "I'm starving too"  
  
****  
  
"I just need to buy some soy milk and going home I just wanna be alone" Carmilla thinks while she gets into the supermarket. She keeps walking until she finds it "I got it" she mutters "now I just need to pay and go home" she says  
  
****  
  
"Hey dad as we're in downtown would you mind if I buy some groceries in the supermarket?" Laura asks  
"Of course not! Let's go" he says "besides I need to know if there's something else but cookies in your kitchen" he winks  
"Ha. Ha! That's funny" she says  
"Hey I'm just saying" he smiles "Come on let's get inside" he adds  
"Ok" she says. As soon as they're inside the supermarket Laura says "dad can you get some soy milk? I'm getting some cookies" she says shyly her father laughs aloud  
"I knew it!" He says "ok honey I'm going" he adds  
"Ok let's see soy milk, soy milk" he says before he collides with someone.  
  
****  
  
"What the hell!" Carmilla says before falling down  
"oh Jeez I'm sorry! I'm really sorry" the man apologizes immediately "I was distracted I didn't see you-"  
"Don't tell" she replies sarcastically without even looking at him "well next time you should see where you're going sir" she gets up and starts walking to the cashier  
"I'm sorry" that's the last thing she hears from the man  
"This is unbelievable! And I thought my day wasn't gonna be worse" she sighs  
  
****  
  
Ell's walking next to her looking around the supermarket "everything seems so normal, I mean it's been just a year but it's like the time hasn't passed by" she mutters "Look there's the man who collides with you" she points in front of her and sighs "yeah I keep forgetting you can't see me anymore" she says "probably she's his daughter, they look pretty happy" (yeah, now Ell favorite's hobby is to watch other people and guess what kind of people they are, what they do...it's really boring being "invisible")she looks to the tiny blond girl who's next to the man and she feels it, unconsciously Ell touches her heart, the one that is not there anymore and she starts walking to them. The man is walking away and the girl is walking to make a line at one of the cashier.  
As she gets closer she can see the tiny girl turns around looking everywhere and then she touches her heart.  
"OMG you feel it too" Ell exclaims  
"What the what?" the girl says with a surprised voice "who are you and why are you yelling at me" the girl whispers/yells  
"Wait! You can see me?" Ell says while snapping her fingers in front of the girl  
"What? Of course I see you. Are you ok miss?" The girl looks at Ell like she's crazy  
"I can't believe you can see me...but wait why can you see me and Carmilla can't?" She says much more to herself than to the blond in front of her  
"Carmilla? I'm sorry what?" The confusion in the girl is obvious now  
"There must be something, a reason. Wait! Wait here I need to find Carmilla asap" Ell pleads  
"I don't- I can't" but before the girl could reply Ell's gone  
"Where is she? Where is she?" Ell says while she's looking around "there she is" she approaches to Carmilla "Love! Come I need you to see someone with me" she tries to touch her but the only thing she sees it's the goosebumps in Carmilla's arm "oh no, no, no, are you kidding me?" she sighs.  
"I need to find the girl again and ask her to tell you I'm ok and you can move on" she runs through the cashier until she sees her.  
"Oh hey! You the tiny blond girl" Ell says "I need you to do me a favor please" the girl turns around and looks at Ell  
"My name is Laura you know?. And it's totally inappropriate too yell in a public place" she declares "besides I gotta pay this before my dad gets worried and comes to see if I'm ok" the gir- Laura says while touching her chest again  
"Darling I don't know if you're blind or just oblivious to this situation but I've been yelling because no one else can hear or see me" Ell points around to let Laura know that in fact no one is looking at them  
"OMG am I getting crazy? Am I talking alone again?"  
Ell laughs "again?" She says  
"I- I was a child, I had a huge imagination ok?" Her cheeks get red  
"Ok not the point I need you to tell my fiancée I'm ok and she can move on" Ell pleads "she needs to know that I'm here just because she can't let me go" she adds  
"Wait! Wait! Are you telling I'm talking with a dead person? A ghost? A ghost as 'I can see dead people' ghost?" Laura's eyes wide as she looks at Ell  
"I don't know if I'm a ghost or something else. I just know that yesterday I was back in the apartment I used to live with Carmilla. And I saw her crying, suffering for me" Ell explains "I need her to know I'm ok and she has to move on. That's why you have to tell her" Ell tries to touch Laura's hand and they both feel the electricity as Laura's hand snaps away from the touch  
"Ok what the hell was that?" Laura asks  
"I certainly don't have the faintest idea" Ell says "the only thing I know is that you can see me, I don't know why or how but now you're the only chance I have to let her know I'm here" Ell adds  
"Look ghost lady I'd love to help you but I don't wanna be in a hospital...again" Laura says "I don't wanna go to an asylum. Besides my dad is waiting for me so I'm sorry!" Laura says before she starts walking to one of the cashier and pays for the items she got.  
"But you're my only chance" Ell walks behind her "and my name is Ell, not ghost lady” she adds  
"Ok Ell look" Laura whispers/yells looking around so that she can see if someone is looking at her talking 'alone' "I understand what you mean! I really do but I can't go and talk to a person who doesn't know me and start talking about her dead fiancée...she would think I'm nuts and as I told you I don't wanna be locked in a hospital again" she gives Ell a plead look "I can't do this you have to find someone else, I don't know a psychic or medium or whatever" Laura says that before getting out of the supermarket leaving Ell behind.  
  
****  
"This is unbelievable" she mutters "and this is supposed to be the fastest one?" She complains.  
"Excuse me lady! Would you mind I don't know...doing your job...I don't know faster" she says it clenching her teeth and rolling her eyes  
"I'm sorry miss but there're some problems right now" the cashier lady says ignoring Carmilla's complaint "can I suggest you to go to another cashier" she adds  
"Fine!" Carmilla answers before walking away.  
"And my only chance to tell you to stop brooding around and be happy is gone" Ell sighs for the hundredth time.  
The sound of a phone ringtone interrupts her thoughts  
"Hello?" Carmilla says  
"My, my kitty cat how have you been?" Mattie's voice chimes in "if I don't call you, you don't even remember you have a sister" Carmilla practically can see her sister rolling her eyes  
"What do you need Mattie? I'm kinda busy right now" she says  
"we need to meet right away. I know you've been mourning Ell but it's been a year now Carmilla. And I don't wanna sound like a bitch, but I gave you space and time, a lot of time actually so now I need you to be at the office tomorrow at first time. You have to understand this is not good for you...at all" Mattie's voice sound sad  
"I know Mattie, I know" Carmilla sighs "but I don't feel I'm ready for this yet. I don't know why but I still feel Ell" her voice breaks "I can't just act like nothing's happened" she whispers  
"Carmilla, I would never ask you to forget Ell, she was your fiancée for god's sake!" Mattie takes a deep breath "You loved her I could see that and she loved you and I know it's been a lot to process for you, but Carm, you have to move on. I don't wanna sound cruel but you didn't die in that accident, she did and I'm pretty sure if there's something else after dead then Ell wouldn't like to see you like this. That's why the only thing I'm saying is life goes on and you need to get over her for your sake" Mattie says "look I'm waiting for you tomorrow at the office, we really need to talk...take care Bella!" She says before hanging up. Carmilla sighs "bye" she answers while getting into her car.  
"At least she knows I would love to see you happy again" Ell whispers  
  
****  
"I'm telling you, I left the contract in my desk. How is it possible you can't find it?" Carmilla says "you know what I'm going and take it by myself. Thank you for nothing" she hangs up the phone "how can I get around this dimwit" she mutters  
"Hey little monster what seems to be the problem?" Mattie chimes in  
"Well apparently my P.A. Has no idea where my desk is" she speaks with clenched teeth "I don't know how I manage to get this kind of people around" she sighs  
"Well not everyone is so immersed in their job and tries to control everything" Mattie says "don't you think you're being too strict with him? I mean the poor guy has been working for a week. And you said the same thing about the last one-" Mattie says  
"I know Matska! That's why I said I'm getting the contract myself" Carmilla tell her sister while taking her blazer and her keys  
"Mother won't be happy is she finds out you fired another one" Mattie warns "besides this one looks like a puppy" Mattie giggles  
"Don't dare to tell me you like this one!" Carmilla exclaims  
"Of course not I like people with big personalities, I just said that this one looks like a kicked puppy when you yell" she shrugs "so don't be too mean with him" she adds  
"Ok, ok! I'm leaving to get the contract for tomorrow's client. I'll give it to you so you can show them the apartment ok?" Carmilla asks  
"Yeah yeah!" Her sister answers before Carmilla walks out their apartment  
"The first year she didn't work at all because she was sad and the second year she's a workaholic. Either way she's still mourning Ell" Mattie says  
  
****  
  
"There's no reason for moving out you know we love having you here Laura" Perry says  
"I know guys" Laura says "you've been the best roomies I've ever had but I don't like been the third wheel here, I know you need your space as a couple. Besides I already have saved enough money for my own apartment and Kirsch is working in a realty company so he got me an appointment for tomorrow" Laura shrugs "it will be fine" she smiles  
"Frosh, we love having you around you're our best friend and we love you very much...but I know you need your own place and enjoy your life" Laf says and Laura smiles  
"Thanks for everything guys. You're the best" Laura comments  
"By the way it's kinda weird Danny hasn't asked you to move out with her if you were feeling like this?" Perry asks  
"Well maybe that's because I haven't told yet" Laura explains "and before you say something guys, if I would've told her probably she would ask me to move out with her, being all protective and treating like a child and I'm tired of that! I wanna be by myself for once and enjoy it" she declares "I really need this time alone" she adds  
"L, it's ok! you know we want the best for you and if you need a time off then you'll have it" Laf says  
"I'm sure Danny will understand Perry says  
  
****  
"Gosh! I just see you working and I get tired! Can we take a walk or go somewhere else this office. I can't be here one more minute" Ell says while walking forth and back in Carmilla's office "seriously Carmilla, you're obsessed with working that's not healthy like at all" she snaps her hands on the desk creating a little airflow, the papers on the desk move and Carmilla turns around from her laptop  
"What the hell?" Carmilla says  
"Carmilla, mother just called me and asked me to talk with the couple from last week they have a problem with the house now" Mattie chimes in "I gotta go right now. Would you mind going to the apartment for today's schedule please?" She asks  
"You can ask SJ or Natalie" Carmilla deadpans  
"I could. But you know the place and you made the contract, see you know more about the place than they do" Mattie answers "besides you need to go out from this office" she adds  
"See even Mattie asks you to leave the frilling office" Ell says "come on lazy one let's go!" She exclaims jumping  
"Fine! But you own me one. You know I hate interacting with people that's why I'm the one in charge of the contracts" Carmilla complains  
"Yeah yeah! Gotta go Or mother will scold me" Mattie waves her hand to say goodbye  
Carmilla sighs "let's start this so I can come back sooner"  
"Oh god you're a grumpy one" Ell rolls her eyes  
  
****  
"Yes I have already the address thank you Kirsch" Laura says before hang up "I think I got everything let's go" she mutters "this place looks amazing I can't wait to see it" she smiles getting into her car and starts the ignition  
  
****  
  
"There's something off, I don't know why but I'm feeling weird"Laura says to herself before getting into the elevator to meet with the realty lady from the agency she hires.  
"It's like something is gonna happen but I don't know what" she says as she touches her chest, her heart has started to beat faster than usual. She steps out of the elevator and see the girl in charge of her contract.  
  
"Good morning Miss-" Carmilla looks at the papers she has in her hand "Hollis, it's nice to meet you my name is Carmilla Karnstein and I'll be the one who shows you the apartment. I know Matska talked to you by the phone and explained she had an emergency call and that's the reason why she can't be here right now" she explains "Would you mind if we get into the apartment?" She asks  
"It's nice to meet too! And of course! Let's get inside miss Karnstein" Laura says extending her hand to shake it with Carmilla's who lifts her to shake her hands.  
"Carmilla where did I hear that name before?" She thought and suddenly snaps her hand when she feels a particular electricity when she shakes Carmilla's hand "what the what?" She says  
"Is there any problem miss Hollis?" Carmilla asks with concerning eyes.  
"No, not problem here! I just feel some kinda electricity whe-" she got interrupted  
"Oh hey! You're the girl who could see me at the supermarket!!" Ell yells while pointing to Laura. Her eyes get wide when she sees the ghost "this can't be happening again!" Laura exclaims  
"I beg your pardon!" Carmilla turns around to face Laura  
"I'm sorry I was talking to myself" Laura smiles nervously "we should get inside now- right, right?" She adds  
"Yes miss Hollis" Carmilla says  
"Please call me Laura, I feel old when someone calls me 'miss Hollis'" she answers  
"Ok Laura" Carmilla says after opening the door and move aside so that Laura can get inside first "after you" she smiles  
"Thank you miss Karnstein" Laura walks inside  
"Please call me Carmilla, it wouldnt be fair to call you by your name and you don't" Carmilla says. She clears her throat "well as you can see the living room's floor is made of wood which gives it a classy touch and the wall are white but if you like we can change the colors-" Carmilla starts explaining  
"Sooooo now that you're here and Carmilla is here and I'm here...you can tell my fiancée that I'm here and she can be happy because I'm ok and the only thing I want for her is to be happy" Ell says  
"Shhh" Laura hisses "trying to listen here" she whispers  
"But you can help me right now please just tell her that and I'll be thankful for the rest of my...dead? Whatever you'll be my hero. I'll never Rest In Peace if she doesn't let me go" Ell pleads "you look like a good person, can you do me this favor" Ell's says  
"I can't! I'm sorry she's gonna think I'm crazy" Laura whispers  
"Oh no you have to...otherwise I promise you I'll drive you nuts" Ell warns  
Laura huffs and follow Carmilla to the kitchen.  
  
Five minutes later...  
"As you can see the kitchen is organized and divided so everything has it's perfectly and oriented to spot to live-" Carmilla explains  
  
"...there's no way for you to hide this  
No spell for you to right this  
No way for you to hide from the demon of the light" Ell sings aloud (very loud)  
"-Plan for plate racks, vertical cookie sheet slots inside cabinets, or ways to tuck the trash out of sight" Carmilla a little oblivious can't see the uncomfortable look Laura has right now  
  
"Love will have its, have its sacrifaceeeeeeessss" Ell yells  
"Oh could you just shut up!!" Laura lost it and yells looking at one corner of the kitchen. Carmilla blinks a couple of times "excuse me what?" She asks a little mortified. Ell turns to see them and get closer to Laura.  
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to say it like that- not that I was saying to you, please don't think I said that to you. I just- just remember an argument I had with a friend and get myself to deep in my thoughts" Laura takes a deep breath and keep talking "I'm really sorry you must think I'm rude. I didn't mean to be impolite I'm sorry" she declares  
"It's ok Laura. That must be a big argument and I hope you solve it soon" Carmilla reassure "and if you want we can arrange this to another day and maybe Mattie can shows you the place herself" she adds  
"No, no it's ok! I'm happy with what I've seen until now and I'd like to start doing the paperwork" Laura says  
"I'm taking this one" she smiles "it's that ok?" She asks  
"Yes, that's perfect. Let's go to the living room to sign the contract" Carmilla leads Laura to the room next to the kitchen  
  
****  
"Is there anything else I can do for you, Laura?" Carmilla asks  
"YES! You have to know that your dead ex fiancée is here and she wants you to know that it's ok to move on...and- and stop being such a workaholic!" Ell chimes in. Laura rolls her eyes  
"No, thank you so much Carmilla and I'm sorry to freak you out with my behavior. I've been under a lot of pressure at work" she apologizes  
"That's ok! I know what you mean" Carmilla answers "ok then I'm going, you can stay if you want here're the keys" Carmilla handles the keys to Laura. "It was a pleasure to meet you" she shakes Laura's hand.  
"My pleasure" Laura says  
"Oh come on! You ain't saying anything?" Ell says with desperation in her voice "you're my only chance to tell her she has to stop mopping around and be happy" she pleads while Carmilla is in her way to the door. "Goodbye" Carmilla says  
"Goodbye" Laura says  
"Wait no!" Ell asks "she's gone" she whines  
"Wait. What are you still here?" Laura blinks "you're not supposed to go with her" she realizes Ell is still in the apartment "how can you stay here?" Laura's voice is a tone higher this time  
"Holy moly! It's true!" Ell's eyes get wide "it's the first time I can be far away from her" she whispers while looking around and then spots Laura's face. "Definitely there's something about you" she adds "I mean think about it. You were the only one who could see me since I came back" she walks to get closer to Laura "you can hear me and see me. And when I tried to touch you there was this kinda electrifying feeling" she says while trying to reach for Laura's hand.  
"What are you doing?" Laura walks away from the touch "the last time you touched me, it hurt me" she says "I'm not touching you again" she states  
Ignoring her words Ell continues her wave of realization "And every time we're in the same room, I mean I don't know if you feel it but it's like my heart starts beating so fast...and I don't have a heart anymore, the feeling is there though" she put her hand on her chin  
"So-so you feel it too" now Laura is the one touching her chin "but why?" She wonders "there must be something but what is it?" She asks  
"No idea!" Ell answers "the only thing I know is that you, a complete stranger can see me and my ex fiancée can't" she adds sighing "so please, please just tell her I'm ok" Ell pleads "she's afraid to live her life because she thinks she'll forget me" Ell says "and I know she loves me. But I also know that when you love someone you want them to be happy"  
"Lady ghost, I wanna help I really do but if I go and tell her I can see dead people. First she's gonna think I'm crazy, second they'll send me to a asylum and I like my freedom very much" Laura says  
"Well now you're stuck with me" Ell answers back  
"What- what you mean? Is this kinda a threat?" Laura mumbles  
"I don't like being a bad person but you gave me no choice" Ell says with a devilish smile  
"Oh my god!" Laura whines while covering her face with her hand "you've got to be kidding me"  
  
Two weeks later ****  
"Oh I got nothing,  
oh I got nothing!  
Oh I got nothing for YOUUU" Ell sings  
"Would you mind letting me correct this assignments...please!!" Laura says it clenching her teeth "look I've been really patient with all your intrusion but I can't stand it anymore" Laura yells  
"So what don't you just call Carmilla and tell her what's going on right here, right now!" Ell yells as well  
"How am I supposed to do that without sounding like a frilly crazy WOMAN!!" Laura slams the notebook she has in her hands  
  
*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK*  
  
"Miss Hollis! Is everything alright?" A voice Laura recognizes is heard.  
  
She sighs opening the door "I'm really sorry Miss Castle. I didn't mean to disturb anybody...I'm so sorry, I really am"  
(Miss Alexis Castle, the president of the neighbors board and a Veronica Mars fan)  
"It's just that some neighbors called me saying you were having a really heat argument with someone...and I supposed it was by the phone because they said they only heard your voice" Alexis says  
"Hahahaha that's a irony don't you think?" Ell chimes in "I mean you were afraid of talking about me huh?"  
Alexis can practically see the veins in Laura's head and the red of her face.  
"I just wanna make sure you're ok and ask you to keep your argument in an appropriate low voice- look Laura, I hate doing this but these neighbors don't like being disturbed so they sent me to tell you that. As I told you before I don't wanna bother you but please consider what I've said" Alexis says while looking at the hallway  
"I know- I know and I'm really sorry again it won't happen again I promise-" Laura says  
"Oh dear don't make promises you won't keep" Ell smirks  
Laura turns to see that spot in the room where Ell is supposed to be and Alexis turns to see nothing but a dark kitchen.  
"Oooooook! I think I get going, good night Miss Hollis" she starts walking to the hallway  
"Goodnight and I'm sorry again" Laura answers just before closes the door.  
"See what you've done!!" She hisses  
"Oh so that's gonna be you're tone now?" Ella says "this is gonna be interesting then" she adds  
"Listen to me Ell, I'm tired and I just wanna sleep right now...let's talk about this tomorrow ok?" Laura explains "I'm sure there's something we can do without the fact that she'll think I'm crazy" she walks to her room and starts putting on her pajamas  
"Ok then Goodnight Laura Hollis" Ell says while she stays in the living room "tomorrow" she mumbles under her breath.  



	2. Chapter 2

“I’ve got a great idea while you were sleeping” says Ell to a sleepy Laura, who’s trying to rub the sleep away from her eyes.  
“Can I have some chocolate first please?” She begs “before we start this conspiracy against your fiancée/ ex fiancée” she concludes   
“I forgot you guys need to eat in order to stay alive” Ell says “but I have to say you have the diet of a toddler with all that sugar consume” she affirms  
Laura chokes with the chocolate cereal she was eating while listening to Ell. She takes deep breaths and when she stops coughing, she takes her tardis mug and drinks some cocoa.  
“Ehem are you implying, I’m a kid because of my diet?” She asks trying to sound offended by Ell’s statement but she’s completely sure Ell is right.  
“Weeeell” Ell points to her mug and the box of Chococrunch next to her.   
“Okay maybe I’ve been under a lot of pressure, maybe I’ve started seeing spirits and that made me eat sugary things because that’s the way I’m dealing with all of this” she explains   
“I’m pretty sure that is not the case, I saw you with a lot of cookies the day I first saw you at the supermarket” Ell deadpans   
“Why don’t we talk about that plan you have” Laura changes the subject as she blushes  
Ell grins and starts explaining “ok. So I’ve been thinking about this plan named “Be Friend Unconditionally with Carmilla Karnstein” Ells says that so fast  
“And...is there a shorter name for the pl an?” Laura asks “I think you just said that faster than me” Laura laughs   
“Hey!” Ell complains “the name explains all the plan so I think is a good name” she defends herself.  
“Okay, okay. Explain what should we do first then?” Laura asks  
“The first thing would be “run into” Carmilla by accident. That way, you two would have the chance to talk and start to know each other” Ell says   
“Great” Laura says nervously   
“Oh, the perfect chance would be later around 5. Carmilla and I usually go to a cafe since we were at the university. “Silas cafe” is close to Bauman’s park. After that we used to go inside the park and sit near to a lake, the-“  
“Vanlis lake right?” Laura asks  
Ell nods in affirmation “how do you-“  
“I went there for breakfast almost every weekend when I was in college, it’s a lovely cafe and its vanilla bean latte is amazing” Laura’s eyes shine with nostalgia at the memory “it’d be great going there today”   
“Yeah, that’d be awesome. I could show you where we sit and you “accidentally” meet Carmilla there” smiles Ell “and of course you will have your latte”   
****  
“Okay, little monster tell me what got you moping around. Seriously you’re brooder than ever, has the puppy made a mistake with the contracts again?” Asks Mattie.  
Carmilla turns around from the window she was looking so deeply, to see her sister making her way inside her office.  
“uhm excuse me what?” Carmilla send an apologetic look   
“Okay, what’s going on?” Mattie demands   
“Mattie,What are you-“  
“Don’t Mattie me kid! You’ve been oddly off these weeks and now I’m kinda worried” she affirms  
Carmilla takes a pen and starts playing with it “well, have you ever felt you’re missing something...and then you kinda feel empty?” Carmilla asks  
“Certainly no. I haven’t” answers sincerely Mattie “may I know what would the missing “something” is?”   
Carmilla clenches and unclenches her jaw for some seconds before she gives up and blurt, “remember when I told you that I could still feel Ell? I could feel her energy around me somehow and I’m not sure how that works but I swear I can- I could feel her but now- not anymore”   
“I remember you saying that, yes. And I’m sure you feel her Carm, maybe you don’t feel her anymore because you’re getting over the fact that she’s not longer with us” Mattie explains  
“No. Ell was the love of my life and I’ll never get over her” she reassures  
“You know what I mean” Mattie says  
“I know” Carmilla sighs “I don’t know how to defined this feeling. It’s emptiness, fear and darkness. All the combo” Carmilla deflates   
“Why don’t we go for a coffee, Carm?” Mattie says while walking to the door “maybe we need some fresh air for this conversation”   
/  
“I can’t believe you could sit here for hours in winter” Mattie holds the to go coffee cup with both of her hands to keep them warm “I remember you telling me you love reading here” Mattie recalls   
“It was Ell’s favorite place too. We used to come here, I used to read while she started drawing some sketches” Carmilla smiles “she could draw anything that catches her attention. It could be a kid riding his bike, the ducks in the lake or an old couple walking slowly at the street-“ Carmilla’s voice cracks, she clears her throat and keep talking “she used to say we will be like those couples, walking, talking about our youth”   
“Kitty” Mattie says worried putting a hand on her sister’s shoulder, squeezing it to give her some comfort.   
“I’m sure anywhere she is. She wants you to be happy, she wants you to keep going and she wouldn’t like you to be sad” Mattie reassures her  
“I know. I know” Carmilla whispers weakly while a single tear escape her left eye.  
****  
“And then she could say I’m crazy or she could put a restraining order against me...” Laura sighs  
“You’re a little negative for someone who calls herself optimistic” Ell answers with a annoyed tone.  
“I’m sorry if I’m realistic and I see my future evaporate with a restraining order. Probably people from the school will find out and they won’t like to have a “stalker” with them...I’m losing my job” Laura takes deep breaths looking at all directions to see if someone can see her talking alone.  
“First of all, NO ONE is watching you because you’re with the earphones so if someone sees you talking alone, they’ll think you’re talking by the phone” Ell explains. It was her idea and she knows it works. “Second of all, I’ve never thought I’d meet someone more dramatic than Carmilla and third, no one will put any restraining order under my watch. Ok? Ell sighs   
“Ok, I believe you. Now can you tell me what’s next in your plan” Laura asks   
“Well next in the “Be-F.U.C.K” plan is-“   
“When I asked you for a shorter name I wouldn’t imagine you made an acronym like this” complains Laura   
Ell laughs at the blush in Laura’s face “as I was saying, in the “Be-F.U.C.K” plan, we will come to this park tomorrow a little earlier than today and see if Carm-“ Ell stops abruptly and fixates her look to the north, what makes Laura look in that direction too and see the person they’ve been talking about is 10 meters from them.  
“What-What do we do?” Laura asks in panic “you said it was late, she wouldn’t be here.oh gosh, she will think we’re following her, that we’re stalking her...wait a minute, she doesn’t even see you. Then, then she’ll think I’m the stalker” Laura’s eyes widen


	3. Chapter 3

Laura starts to breath faster and faster. “Laura, Laura. Calm down and breath!. Probably She doesn’t even see you. And probably she doesn’t remember you...just breath, okay?” Ell tries to comfort Laura, unconsciously touching her shoulder with her hand making Laura moves abruptly and scream at the sensation when she feels the electricity in all the body.  
“Ahhh, Don’t do that” says Laura, trying to cover her mouth when she realizes she screamed.  
“Ouch, I’m sorry. I forgot about our little “spark” and let me tell you that it hurt me too” Ell complains, turning to see if someone notice them.  
“Ufff, they didn’t hear us” Ell says relieved “well the plan is this...get closer” Ell grins  
“WHAT?” Laura turn so fast, she probably gets whiplash.  
“C’mom just get closer” Ell rolls her eyes  
“But what do I say? How do I start a conversation with her? Be-Besides she’s busy, you see she’s talking to that girl over there, so it’d be better if we come tomorrow with a better plan...Yeap, it’d be better tomorrow” Laura starts walking when Ell blocks her way “I swear by whichever higher entity you believe that I’ll hug you, so you feel the electricity again and again.” Ell threatens “Laura, you promise” Ell says in despair. Laura deflates in surrender “Okay, you’re right. I promised” she answers sighing  
/  
“Mi- miss Karnstein, how are you? What a coincidence meet you here” Laura laughs nervously. Ell rolls her eyes, “so subtle” she whispers.  
The two sisters turn to see her, “uh Miss Hollis?” Carmilla surprisingly remembers her. “what a coincidence indeed” she says. She clears her throat “uhum, she’s my sister Matska, I guess you already know her” Carmilla Concludes  
“In fact, Miss Hollis and I never got the chance to meet personally. All the arrangements were by the phone” Mattie explains. The older sister extends her hand to shake Laura’s “pleasure” she says  
“Likewise” Laura says  
“She’s Mattie, Carmilla’s older sister and her confident. She looks all indifferent and formal but she loves Carmilla more than she wants to accept...its her little monster after all” smiles warmly Ell “probably, she’s the one who brought Carm here”  
“So how things are going at the department, Miss Hollis? You know, if you need something m, you just need to contact with our company and we can help you” Mattie tries to converse with Laura.  
“The apartment is amazing. I love living there, it’s so comfort and cozy...I love it. Thanks for asking Mattie” smiles Laura.  
“Oh, it’s funny, you know the nickname I use for my sister” Carmilla chimes in while Mattie raises an eyebrow at Laura.  
Damm it! Ell called her Mattie not Carmilla, thinks Laura. She needs to think a quick answer as soon as possible. “Eh, I, me” she can think in a coherent answer.  
“Tell them you heard Carmilla use that name to Mattie before you interrupt their conversation” Ell says fast while moving her hands around nervously.  
“Well I heard you calling her like that before I greeted you. But now that you make it clear you are the only one who calls her like that, I won’t” Laura says  
“No. I think you can call me that too, Miss Hollis” Mattie says and Carmilla’s eyes bulge as she couldn’t believe what she’s hearing. Carmilla sends her sister a confused look, she knows Mattie doesn’t let anyone being informal with her.  
“Okay, but only if you call me Laura instead of Miss Hollis” Laura answers smiling.  
“And what brings you here, Laura?” Asks Carmilla raising a perfect eyebrow. Carmilla has decided to stand up from the bench and look Laura right into her eyes getting blushed by the intense gaze of the dark haired girl.  
“Eh...I...well” Laura turn to her right, where Ell is, pleading for her with her eyes.  
“Don’t look at me, remember they can’t see me” Ell exclaims and Laura redirect her gaze to the lake.  
“Well, I came for the lake. It relaxes me sitting here and see how calmed is this place. The lake is beautiful and sometimes when I come to see it, I enjoy seeing the people pass by, the kids playing or the ducks swimming...I’ve come here since I was at college, it’s comforting you know?” Laura stops looking at the lake and turn to see Carmilla, surprised by the intense gaze Carmilla is giving her. Now that she notices, Carmilla’s face looks tired like she hasn’t slept well in days.  
“It’s interesting how you’ve described it” Carmilla says nostalgically.  
When Mattie realizes the change of mood in her little sister, she decides to intervene.  
“So what do you do for living, Laura? Asks the older sister  
“I’m a English language teacher” answers Laura nervously “at Saint Briggs School” specifies the blond  
“Interesting” Mattie says, even though they know it’s not interesting at all.  
“Why do you think is interesting?” Ask the shorter one  
“Well, I can picture you as a teacher” answers Mattie  
“Wh-Why do you say that?” Asks Laura, expecting curiously the answer.  
“The way you talk and you move your hands when you explain what you’re saying” Mattie explains, looking at her fingernails as if was the most common thing in the world  
“I don’t do that, do I?” Laura asks in shocked “I hadn’t noticed it” she touches her chin  
“If you do it everyday then you start doing it anywhere” Mattie explains  
Suddenly, Carmilla takes her mobile from the left pocket of her jacket.  
“Hello? Yeah, that’s me. Wait a second please. Excuse me ladies” she says and walks some meters from you, that hasn’t gone unnoticed by her sister. Ell goes after her moving her hand to make Laura know she’s going with Carmilla.  
Does she have to move her hands like that? In the name of Helga Hufflepuff, there’s no need to be “discrete” when you are the only one who can see her thinks Laura before rolling her eyes.  
“It was a call from the office” says Carmilla approaching to them “I gotta go now”. That makes Mattie sends her a suspicious look “it was a pleasure to meet you, Laura” Carmilla warmly but formal at the same time.  
When she offers her hand to shake Laura’s, and as Laura felt an electricity when she touched Carmilla last time, she step closer and kiss her cheek taking by surprise to the three of them. She felt a little spark but it was softer than the one before.  
Carmilla can’t make any sentence and when Mattie offers her hand. Laura has to kiss her cheek too so they could think that’s the way she greets/say goodbye. Carmilla, starts walking with Mattie by her side “What. Was. That?” Mattie asks  
“I don’t know” Carmilla says thoughtfully “remember when I told you I could feel Ell by my side?” She asks  
“Yeah, I do” answers Mattie “what about it?” She adds  
“What do you think if I say I felt hem again but this time as soon as Miss Hollis showed up” Carmilla frowning  
“And apparently I got little electric shocks whenever we our skins have contact” she says in disbelief  
“Hey, kitty cat!” Mattie stops and make her sister do the same “Are you okay?” She looks concerned  
“I don’t know what going on, Mattie” Carmilla looks determined “but I’m finding out” she adds  
****  
“What the hell was that?” Asks Ell  
“I don’t know” Laura shrugs  
“You know what I mean-“ Ell pushes  
“Maybe there’s something I haven’t told you yet” she fidgets with her hands. Ell stops walking and turn to see Laura  
“Well then, tell me” She exclames  
“You see, when I saw you with Carm- Carmilla, at my department. Well when it’s wasn’t my department yet. When I shook her hand, I felt the same spark I had when you touched me” Laura declares sighing  
“WHAT?” Ell yells and Laura cringes at the high pitch of her voice.  
/

They’ve gotten home an hour ago but Ell hasn’t said anything, not even a word nor a sigh. Or one of the songs she keeps humming or singing every time Laura’s reading the essays she asked her students. It hasn’t go unnoticed by the teacher that Ell is probably thinking about what happened earlier.  
Also she can’t deny that she hasn’t stopped thinking about Carmilla Karnstein, who wasn’t in bottom up, tie and dress pants. Nope, Carmilla Karnstein who’s been in leather jacket, black t-shirt with “the eagle of death metal” stamped on it and black boots. The most perfect eyebrows you’ve ever seen in a person. Black wavy hair, her skin is pale and smooth (or at least you think is should be like that). Stop thinking about it, Hollis! You chaste yourself.  
“Are you okay, Ell?” She asks trying to fill the agonizing silence. But Ell is still deep in thoughts  
“Ell, are you okay?” She repeats this time in a higher tone. Ell’s catatonic state is broken and she turns to see you.  
“Excuse me, what?” She whispers  
“I was asking if you’re okay? I mean you haven’t seen her in two weeks so- and you haven’t enlightened me with your voice in more than an hour-“ Laura smiles  
“She wasn’t talking with the phone with anyone. She made it up!” Ell exclaims  
“What?” It’s all Laura can say  
“She didn’t have any important call or meeting” she made it up  
“Why would she do that?” Laura asks  
“I don’t know but that’s not something Carmilla would do” Ell sighs “actually she’s done it with her mother when she feels uncomfortable but she wouldn’t have to do it with you. I mean we didn’t do anything to bother her, right?” Ell asks  
“I don’t thinkso, well maybe it was because I electrified her with “the spark”, right?” She makes quotation marks with her hands  
“No, it wasn’t that. Remember she got the call first, “the spark” was later when you were saying goodbye” Ell comment and she’s right.  
“Why? Why? Why would she do that?” Ell says exasperated “what could have happened for her to react like th-“ Ell froze in the middle of the living room, Laura turns to see her to see why she stopped talking.”What’s wrong? Laura asks concerned  
“Some- something is wrong! I feel weird” Ell answers while looking at her hands which makes Laura look at her hands and realizes  
“Ell, ELL, you’re fadin-“ Laura says. And as Ell stumbled into her life, she disappeared in front of Laura’s eyes. Laura’s shocked, her yes widen.  
“In the name of Albus Dumbledore, What the heck is going on here?” She asks exasperated


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I hope you’re enjoying the story so far. It was the first one I wrote a few years ago, please be understanding English is not my first language. Greetings from Peru :)

It’s been three days since she’s last seen Laura Hollis, why did she react like that to her like she was burning. She can’t explain what happened.  
“What’s wrong?” Mattie asks  
“What do you mean?” Retorts Carmilla, without looking away from the book she was reading or at least trying to read.  
“Kitty-cat, You haven’t said anything else, after you told me what you felt when we met Laura. You haven’t touched that topic again” answers Mattie  
“Well, If we’re talking why don’t we start by you telling her she can call you Mattie when you don’t like anyone but the family called you like that” snaps Carmilla  
“First of all, don’t change the topic Carmilla. Second, I don’t see any harm allowing her call me Mattie” she says “besides I feel this special bond, like we’ve met before. Like I can trust her” she explains  
“Maybe In another life” she adds humorously.  
The black haired girl hasn’t stopped looking at her sister.  
“I felt the same the day I met her” admits Carmilla  
“Well knowing that I’d like you to tell me why did use the “I got a call” excuse with her. I mean really?” Mattie looks straight at her sister’s eyes. “Laura Hollis hasn’t done anything for you to treat her like that. What’s happening? Could you tell me how you feel, Bella?” Asks the older sister concerned.  
Carmilla sighs, she stays silent organizing her ideas, then she takes a breath  
“Mattie, the first time I saw her, I felt I met her before. Then I felt this “spark” when she touched me. After that, we met again and it happened again. Without sayin th-“ she cuts herself  
“Without saying what?” Mattie asks curiously.  
Carmilla takes a deep breath and exhales slowly “ without saying that I’ve felt empty since I saw her two weeks ago...and when we saw her three days ago, that emptiness is gone” she explains  
“Besides, before I met Laura Hollis. I could feel Ell close, like she didn’t go anywhere. I know it isn’t logic, but I left Laura’s department I couldn’t feel Ell anymore” Carmilla turns to see her the book in her hands hiding her eyes when she feels the sting of unshed tears.  
“Carm. Kitty-cat, I know you love Ell. I’ve been witness in first row, but I also believe Ell wouldn’t like to see you like this. She’d hate to see you like this” Mattie smiles “Ell loved you until her last day, she’d like you to be happy. Because your happiness was hers...and if there’s something I realize is that you made an excuse to avoid Laura Hollis, you were uncomfortable and I can even say you were nervous..my question is why does she do to make you feel like thatf ?”asks Mattie curiously  
“Mattie” sighs Carmilla. “When Laura Hollis ran into us today, for that short period of time, when she talked about what she does when she’s at the lake...I felt something” Carmilla explains exasperated.  
“Something like what? Do you like her?” Mattie’s eyes bulge and her eyebrows almost touch her hair. “I KNEW IT! The tiny teacher is charming-“ Mattie smiles  
“No Mattie. No. I can’t like Laura Hollis- I can’t do that to Ell, when I felt “that” something I felt like I was betraying her, I can’t” she exclaims while she gets up from the sofa and makes her way to the front door.  
“Kitty” says Mattie but her voice doesn’t get to the younger sister.  
It has been a lot for a day, she needs some time by herself, Mattie thinks.

Of course no one noticed ascertain blond in the corner of the room, who heard all the conversation.  
“Carmilla” whispers Ell while trying to process everything she just heard. “I gotta do something” Ell she says, she doesn’t go after Carmela though. She stays in the department making a plan

****

“What the heck happened? I mean Ell was here and then she vanished and now I think I’m going crazy-“ Laura thinks  
“Laura, Laura, can you hear me?” Perry asks, maybe with a high pitch voice that makes Laura get out of those ideas.  
“Sorry Perry. You were saying” Laura apologizes  
“Ok honey, these days you’ve been even more distracted than ever. And even Laf asked me to give you space and time to talk about it. I really want you to tell me what’s bothering you so much” Perry explains tenderly, like a mother who’s trying to talk to her child.  
“You know I always try to let you be yourself and I wait for you to be comfortable enough to tell us what’s going on. Also I know that Perry talking about knitting is not a topic that makes me jump in one foot...but I know you like listening to her. I’m worried about you too, I’d like to know what ms happening,L” Laf concludes.  
Laura takes a deep breath and say “have I been more distracted than ever lately? I haven’t realized” she laughs nervously “don’t worried about me guys. Probably it’s because of all the responsibilities at the school, the exams. Probably-“  
“Laura, you’re on winter break” Laf deadpan  
“You’re gonna think I lost it” Laura whines  
“Anything that’s bothering you or making you uncomfortable, you can tell us. You know you can count on us” Laf comforts her  
“I know. I know. But when I tell you you’ll think I lost a piece here” she points her head 

/

“Sooooo the ghost of the fiancée of the woman who sold you this apartment is here?” Laf ask skeptical  
“Yes, I mean no. First she was here in the middle of the living room and then she vanished- wait, that was sarcasm, right?” Asks Laura feeling small  
“We’re not here to judge, Lafontaine” scolds Perry  
“I’m sorry Frosh, I didn’t mean to make you feel bad. It’s just, you know I always try to look for a logic explanation to everything. I always let the science to gives me the answer, although I try to have an opened mind. I don’t get these paranormal things” Laf say shameful  
“I didn’t believe this stuffs. And honestly I think I’m going crazy, guys” Laura complains  
“Well Laura honey, I think I can help you with that” Perry says  
“Really?” Laura exclaims excitedly  
“Really?” Laf says suspiciously  
“You see, this is not the first time I get face to face with paranormal activity” explains Perry fidgeting with the sleeves of her sweater  
“What do you mean, Perr?” Laf ask concerned  
“We always believe there’s something else after death. In fact, some members of my family are mediums and seers” Perry says a little ashamed of it. People always judge when she says this.  
“Then, you can help me. Right?” Laura sighs with relief, she widen her eyes at the thought of helping Ell and Carmilla.  
“You could call someone from your family and ask them to help me to communicate with Ell. And help Carm...I mean Carmilla” she blushes  
“Okay. First, Perr I didn’t know anything what you’ve just said. That explains why you fired incense all the first year at college and those charms I found under my pillow. Second, so Carm eh?” Laf say with a smirk and Laura blushes again.  
“Lafontaine!” Scolds Perry  
“Oh Help me, Dumbledore” begs Laura at the same time.


	5. Chapter 5

“When people don’t feel right, they usually go to a bar to drink the problems away, they go and talk with their friends or go to their safety place. They don’t go to a frilling library...Maybe this is my safety place” she argues “yeah probably” she agrees  
She’s been trying to look for any logical explanation in what happened with Laura Hollis. So far she’s learned that, in fact, some people can pass the electricity to others. That is because all the appliances transmit energy, so when two bodies collide that generate “a spark” and that is created by the exchange of protons and electrons, which means the electricity jump from a person who accumulated the static to a conductor one. “You see, there’s an explanation for it, that would be the answer” she says, but she doesn’t feel relieve. She wants to see Miss Hollis again and she knows that static can’t make you want to see a person. She walks out the library and starts her way to home.

When she gets there, Mattie is already asleep. She goes to the office to read some more about what she found out.  
After a while she huffs bored with all the mysticism she’s read on the internet. She turns to see the a bunch of papers on the desk, she picks them up and starts reading them.  
“Gas bill, mobile bills, credit card status” she reads. Then she froze, another letter from “Organ and Tissue donation and transplant for Canadian blood services” she sighs and opens it, there’s another letter inside of it. 

To: my savior’s relatives

Hi again, I was working therefore I couldn’t write before. I hope you are good, I know how grave is and I wouldn’t like you to be in too much pain. The person who donated their heart. (As I said before, I wish I could have their name but the transplant services didn’t give it to me).They saved my life. Before the transplant I was so weak I couldn’t even walk because I started hyperventilating, I had to study at home, do some college at home too, I just went to take the exams on weekends. I was a porcelain doll before. The person, your relative, saved me and I will never be grateful enough to thank them, they made me feel alive again.  
I know you lost someone you love, I know you’re grieving. I can’t have words to comfort you, the only thing I can say is that the person who saved me still lives in me, part of her spark stay in me and I won’t waste the chance to enjoy life, always honoring the last gift they shared.  
I wish I could meet you sometime, the organization says that it would depend on you, I hope you say yes. It would be a pleasure to meet you and thank you personally. 

She reads it again and again. She put the letter back into its envelope, she’ll return this one as she did with the others. She gets into her bedroom and collapses on her bed, she’s too tired to take a shower right now. She closes her eyes and falls asleep immediately.

****  
Next day

“So you can help me right? I mean I know it’s too much to ask for you to ask someone of your family, to help a girl they don’t even know to help a ghost to communicate with the ghost’s fiancée, who they don’t know either-“  
“Laura honey, relax. I’m sure they’ll help you with pleasure, they know I consider you as family. They know you’re my family too” Perry says cutting the teacher’s ramblings  
“Blood makes you relative, but loyalty makes you family. You’ve been there for us whenever we needed you, and that’s enough for me to consider you my family, Frosh. Even though I’m a little skeptical at this” Laf add  
“My cousin is coming around midday” Perry says  
“What was her name again?” Asks Laura  
“Ruby. Ruby Renaud” Perry answers smiling  
/  
*Knock knock knock*  
“Coming” Laura yells from the kitchen. She recognizes Perry’s cousin immediately, she has curly red hair not as long as Perry’s but they look alike. Their outfit it’s totally different though, Perry always wear something comfortable and sober. Her cousin is wearing light green T-shirt, a leather jacket, blue jeans overall, hat and sunglasses. She looks like she’s hangover but that couldn’t be. Right?  
“Ohh Ruby, how are you?” Perry walkable out the kitchen with Laf by her tail, “how’s aunt Kaitlyn?” Perry asks happily “how’s Matt and uncle Aaron?”  
“Hey cousin!” She hugs Perry “they’re okay, Matt is at college, he couldn’t come home for the holidays. But we Skype whenever he’s free” she explains “aunt Kaitlyn and uncle Aaron finally moved to the suburbs, they live in Belle’s street now”  
“Oh that’s great they always wanted to move from that apartment” claps Perry enthusiastically “by the way, where’s Claire? I thought you guys have a business together...”The seeing sisters” right?” She asks curiously  
“Yeah, Yeah. Well Claire went to visit her baba. She is in Macedonia for these weeks, so it’s just me today, is that alright?” Ruby asks  
“Of course it’s alright” smiles Perry  
“Let me introduce one of my best friends, Laura Hollis, I’ve talked to you about her” she adds  
“Yes, I remember the little teacher with a concerning sugar ingestion. Right?” Ruby answers  
“Yeap, that’s me” blushes Laura, she extends her hand to shake Ruby.  
“Nice to meet y-“ She starts  
“Woah, I can feel you have something that doesn’t belong to you. Your life is borrowed and you made a bond with the dead” Ruby says calmly shaking Laura’s hand. Laura drops her jaw at that statement and look to Perry.  
“I didn’t say anything. Just ask her to come as soon as possible” she shrugs “I told you my family has the gift” she explains before introduces Lafontaine again.

“Oh, and I know you’ve met Lafontaine at the weeding” Perry explains  
“Woah, is that Lafontaine? I couldn’t recognize them with the eyebrows” Ruby laughs  
“Hahaha” Laf deadpan  
“I remember that” Laura starts laughing. Lafontaine cleat their throat “anyway, nice to see you too” they say.

****

She fell asleep with her clothes on, the curtains are opened and the sun is brightening at her eyes. She growls, it’s too early for her or at least she thinks so. Which day is it today again? What time is it?  
She reluctantly turns to see her cellphone and sighs loudly.  
It’s 9:30 am and it’s Monday, she wants to keep sleeping but the sun doesn’t let her sleep. On the other side she’s too lazy to get up and close the curtains so she covers her face with the blankets.  
/  
By noon she couldn’t take it anymore and decides to make some coffee before starts her day.  
She hasn’t slept good these days, always feeling some chills even when the window is closed. She looks the desk and see the letter. 

How can someone think of meeting the person who got their fiancée’s heart? That would be unbearable for her. To know this person has it, to hear it beat...in someone else. She couldn’t do this, she’s not that brave. Her eyes glisten with tears.

“I can’t do that, Ell” she whispers “I can’t-“ her voice quivers 

Ell, who has been watching Carmilla intensely, doesn’t say anything. Even though she knows it wouldn’t do a difference.  
“Please, forgive me. Please forgive me, cuz I can’t forgive myself- I won’t” tears are blurring her eyes now, she raises from her seat and tries to clean the filthy feeling by showering.  
Ell didn’t move at all, she cries for Carmilla. She needs to help her, to tell her it wasn’t her. It wasn’t her fault after all. She needs Laura to tell her, how can she go to Laura? 

She needs Laura right now, she needs to go to her. She might know how to. I mean she’s watched “13 ghosts” , “the conjuring” , “The sixth sense” and “ghostbusters” she rolls her eyes, maybe she should’ve watched other movies that could help her now. Like “Ghost” or “Just like heaven” oh shoot! Now She realizes that she shouldn’t have hated cheesy movies.  
She knows she’s bounded to Laura, she doesn’t know the reason though. She looks a the letter, there’s something about it, she knows that but she can’t figure it out.  
So she starts thinking about Laura, about her apartment, about her living room the last time they were talking, she keeps doing it for a while focus her mind in that place, every single detail of that department until she feels it. Now she knows she can do that, she keeps thinking and thinking, picturing Laura and her place.  
She looks at her hands they’re fading again, she smiles because she’s going to see Laura again. She disappeared with a puff of air making the letter falls.

****  
“...okay I just need some incense and oh! I forgot the bat wing at the car-“ says Ruby  
“Did you just say bat wing?” Laura asks in awe  
“Yeah she did” Laf smiles “can I touch it first?” They asks with puppy eyes 

“HOLY SHIT! I knew it’d work!” Ell yells while fist bumping into the air  
“What the what?”  
“What the fuck?”  
Say Laura and Ruby at the same time.  
“Laura! Laura! Did you see it? I could come back to you” Ell jumps to hug Laura but when she gets closer she hits an invisible wall around the teacher. “What the hell laura?” She complains while falling to the ground  
“Ell, are you okay? What happened? Why are you on the ground” asks Laura  
“I may have something to do with that” chimes in Ruby. Both blondes turn to see her.  
“Well then explains yourself” utters Ell  
Ruby turn to where Ell, making her aware that she’s aware of her presence.  
“Who’s that?” Ell asks facing Laura.  
“She’s Ruby, Perry’s cousin” Laura looks at Perry and Laf and notice their confused look.  
“Okay, maybe you can go now” advices Ruby  
“Ok” answers Perry walking to the door  
“But Perr, can you imagine what this mean for science. This would prove that people don’t die but go to an a-dimensional place. I wanna stay” they demand  
“This is not for a experimental experience, Lafontaine. This is about Laura and Ruby helping a person” she states. Laf deflate and walk behind her, when they get to the doorknob they see Laura. “Promise me you’ll tell me all what happens here” they ask  
“Sure will do” Laura smiles  
/  
“Okay, now that they’re gone. I have a few questions” Ell clears her throat  
“Who’s this Ruby girl? What does she mean she had something to do for me not to touch you? Why did you let her do that? And girl, you have to change your closet...a giraffe pattern sweater, really?” Ell remarks  
Laura is about to answer but Ruby is the first to answer.  
“Hello there, Ell. I’m Ruby, Ruby Renaud. Laura here asked me to help her help you to contact your ex fiancée. I wasn’t sure if you were a ghost or a poltergeist because my cousin didn’t explain anything. So I gave Laura a charm with some jade stones to protect her from spirits. About her clothing choices, I was about to say the same thing” concludes Ruby  
“Oh that’s why you gave that bracelet, I thought it was a souvenir.” Laura says “ I should’ve told you, Ell wasn’t a bad person/ghost” she adds  
“So you can see me, right?” Ell asks  
“Actually I can’t see you, I can hear you though. I can feel your presence, look” she holds her arm up to show them her goosebumps  
“That’s cool” Ell says  
“My friend can see all the spirits. She’s not in the country though” Ruby says  
“But why can I see her? I mean I’ve never experienced anything paranormal. However I was the only one who could see her...well before you come” Laura says worriedly  
“That’s something we need to find out in order to go on this” Ruby says  
“I’m afraid we have no time for that, Laura” Ell says desperate  
“What happened? Is Carmilla okay?” Laura asks  
“No. I, finally, discover why I’m here. Carm thinks she’s responsible of my death” Ell voice cracks “she’s blaming herself”  
“That’s a strong motive for you to come back. If she thinks it’s her fault you wouldn’t go back, she needs to forgive herself and move one” Ruby comments.  
Laura noticed Ell’s face when Ruby says that Carmilla must move one. “Moving on doesn’t mean forget Ell” she says “but it wouldn’t be fair for you to be attached here watching Carmilla breaking apart” she adds  
“I know that Laura. I’ve seen her being sad more times than be peaceful since I came back, I can’t let her be unhappy” Ell says confidently “so what the plan?”  
“We’re gonna do an intervention or I may say a ghostervention” she giggles at her own pun  
“You can’t see me but I’m rolling my eyes” Ell says and Laura laughs  
“I’m so glad you’re here with me, Ell” Laura says. “I’ve missed you and your lovely voice in my mornings” she adds sarcastically  
Ell grins “ohh I missed you too short stacks” she answers  
“Hey! You’re literally an inch taller than me” Laura glares at her  
“Well kid, an inch is an inch” Ell laughs  
Ruby clears her throat to get their attention. “Okay pals, let’s start this. You” she points to Laura “call Carmilla and asks her to come here...make and excuse for here to be here ASAP”  
“You” she points where she thinks Ell is “tell me everything that happened since the moment you came back till this morning” Ruby commands.  
“Okay. Uhm everything started the day before the first anniversary of my dead...” Ell begins to resume her story  
Laura walks to the kitchen to make a phone call.  
“Answer, answer!” She demands  
“Good Afternoon, you’ve called the office of Miss Karnstein. I’m Kirsch, how may I help you?” Her friend asked  
“Oh hey Kirsch, could you tell me if Carm-Carmilla is there?” She asks a bit too eager.  
Kirsch was confused by the voice inquiring about her boss, then he recognized his friend  
“Oh hey Laura, how are you? Mmm Miss Karnstein is not here but as soon-“ He was cut  
“Can you give me her cell phone number?” She asks  
“I don’t think that would-“ he was cut again  
“It’s really important for me to talk to her...about the department” she pushes  
“in that case, I can ask Miss Karnstein’s sister. She’s at her office right no-“ and again he was cut by the blonde  
“Nooooo! I mean no, I need Miss Karnstein and Miss Karnstein only” she interjects “Kirsch, you know I wouldn’t ask for her personal information at least it wasn’t important”  
He sighs, he knows that. “Okay, but if she gets mad and asks who gave it to you. Don’t say my name” he begs  
“Thanks you. Thank you. Thank you” she says


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: mention of blood.

Two years ago:

Friday 17th, April 2015

It’s a lovely morning, the smell of coffee makes her go to the kitchen and give the morning kiss to the love of her life. Her beautiful girlfriend who,now that she thinks about it, is usually grumpy at this time, she got suspicious when she heard her humming a song. She looks at her from the kitchen door, she’s making pancakes. Then Carm starts singing, Ell loves it when she sings in French.

Moi je n'étais rien et voilà qu'aujourd'hui  
Je suis le gardien du sommeil de ses nuits, je l'aime à mourir  
Vous pouvez détruire tout ce qu'il vous plaira  
Elle n'a qu'à ouvrir l'espace de ses bras pour tout reconstruire  
Tout reconstruire, je l'aime à mourir

“Hey babe” she says “I hope it’s me who got you singing and cooking at this, as you say, ‘unholy’ time of the day” she quotes her girlfriend, kissing her cheek  
“Hey gorgeous, how did you sleep?. Yes, you got me this sappy and goofy” Carm answers smiling “why don’t you go and get dressed while I set everything here” Carmilla says  
Ell raises an eyebrow at the dark haired girl next to her. “I’ll explain after you get ready, Okay?” she says warmly  
“Okaaaay. But let me tell you that you got me all curious now” she admits. She goes to get ready faster than usual, her girlfriend being that happy in the morning is something she didn’t expect when she woke up this morning. Deep inside, she knows this is gonna be a special day. She can feel it  
/

“Well, now you can tell what it’s going on? You got all my attenti-” she says as soon as she gets to the kitchen. Then she realizes that her girlfriend has set up the coffee cups, a pair of plates with pancakes, maple syrup and a rose on the side. She also realizes that her girlfriend is not there.

“Do you like it?” Carmilla’s voice startles her, she turn to give the sweetest kiss she can to Carm.  
“I love it” Ell whispers  
“I’m glad you like it” Carm says. Taking her hand to lead her inside the kitchen. Carmilla grabs a chair and help her to seat.  
“Thank you, love” she grins when Carmilla kisses her temple  
“You are very welcome my dear” Carm comments with her best British English.  
“May I know the reason you invested your precious sleeping time in this lovely breakfast” Ell imitates her, both of them start laughing.  
Carmilla and Ell love that accent.  
“Okay, I’m not complaining but I’d like to know why you did this lovely surprise” Ell comments.  
Carmilla clears her throat, she’s nervous and the blonde gets worried. Has something happened? Is she okay? Did she have an argument with her mom again?  
“Babe, are you okay?” Ell holds her hand  
“Ell, do you remember the first thing I say when I met you?” Carm asks  
“That’s my seat, bitch!” She teases  
“Okay, the second thing I told you. And in my defense, that was my seat” Carm laughs. Carmilla and her didn’t get along when they met each other.  
She tries to recall “you’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen” she says when she finally remembers. Obviously, that was like five months later, when Carm and her went to the same fraternity party.  
“Yeah, and I wasn’t lying. You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever met, and I ain’t talking just about your appearance. You’re beautiful in every single way, Ell” Carmilla says heartily.  
“When you got into my life, you give my life a purpose and I wouldn’t change anything. Being with you makes me want to be a better person, listening your voice is all I want when I wake up in the morning and I’m sure there’s nothing that could fill my life with happiness, except you. Ell Sheridan, you would make me the happiest person in the world if you accept to share your life with me, would you marry me?” By this time, Ell is already in tears. Carmilla gets on her knee and takes Ell’s left hand and put a ring on it. Ell kisses her fiancée.  
“Yes, yes. I wanna marry you” she says excited “I” kiss “love” kiss “you” kiss. “I wanna share my life with you” Ell kisses her now fiancée again and again.  
“Thank you for sharing your life with me” Carmilla deepens the kiss. And her phone rings, she glares at it and Ell laughs. “You’d better answer, love” comments Ell “but I’m sure who it is at this time in the morning” she adds.  
“Hello Mattie, How was you’re flight?...what do you mean I have to go to that meeting?” She asks frowning “but I told you I have plans for today” she whispers “I don’t care what mother says. She’s not ruining my plans today” she exhale annoyed  
Ell hugs her and starts massaging her back. She hates it when Carm argues with her mom, “why don’t you go and make sure to come back by dinner? I can make a reservation in “Sabatini’s” Ell suggests  
Carmilla smiles “Okay” she says “Mattie, I’ll be there but I need to come back by 7. Is that okay?” She asks. “Then see you in a bit” she says before hanging up

/

“You should go now otherwise you’ll be late” Ell says before kissing her fiancée  
“But I don’t want to go” Carm whines  
“We’ll celebrate later” Ell whispers close to her ear before she nibbles it. Carmilla’s eyes are blown with lust, she kisses Ell. “See you later, love” Ell says  
“Later” Carm says before going through the threshold  
/

Around 5:30 in the afternoon, The phone rings...

“Hello?” She asks  
“Oh, hello future Mrs. Karnstein. How was your day? Hope your afternoon is more entertained than mine. I was calling because I’m still at the meeting but they served some champagne here for celebrating we got the contract. I can’t drive, would you mind coming to pick me up?” Carmilla asks “I’m not even tipsy but I know that if a police officer decides to stop me. I could get a ticket for it” she explains  
“That’s okay, babe. We can go to the restaurant after I pick you up” Ell says smiling  
“Okay, love you” says Carm before hanging up 

/  
It’s almost 6 when she is ready to pick Carmilla up. She messages her telling her she’s going, after that she starts the car.  
She had to take other ways if she wants to get where her fiancée is. 

The traffic lights are on green when she speeds up, it didn’t come to her mind someone thought it would beat the light before it change. They were unable to hit the brakes on time, and her car was hit on the left side by a van. 

For her, everything was in slow motion as soon as she heard the brakes screeching in the street. Suddenly her car was rolling and she try to protect her face from the pieces of the window that blew all over her.  
She could feel a sharping pain on her head and could see blood dripping from her face and hands. She knew it before she could encourage the strength to scream for help, she knew she couldn’t make it. She felt so tired, she only wanted to sleep but deep inside she knew that if she did that she wouldn’t do what she needed.  
Although she felt her skull was about to explode she kept looking for her phone, when she found it. Her hand pressed the call bottom as she called the only person she wanted to hear.  
“Hey, love. I’m ready so whenever you come- Ell what’s going on? Why is people screaming? Where are you? What happened-“  
“Carm, I- I had an acc-accident” she stopped for coughing “I love you! You have no idea how much I love you”  
“Where’re you? I’m going...Mattie!! Mattie!!!” Her fiancée yells  
“Please, listen to me” *Cough* “you deserve so much love” *cough* “Enjoy life for me” *cough* “I love you, don’t forget that. I will always love you” 

She was exhausted, she could feel her life being drained and she couldn’t do anything to avoid it. Her eyes were heavy and she couldn’t focus anymore.  
“Ell! ELL! Talk to me, please! Talk to me” begged Carmilla she knew Carmilla was with Mattie, she could hear a car speeding up.  
And when she has no more energy, she resigned herself.

“When the evening shadows and the stars appear  
And there is no one there to dry your tears  
Oh, I hold you for a million years  
To make you feel my love” she coughs hardly, she’s too weak for singing it, therefore she just say the lyrics. “I didn’t had the chance to tell you that I think of you every time I listen that song, I was waiting for a right time. Carm, you made me feel the most beloved person in the world, thank you for that I-“ she couldn’t talk anymore her eyes closed and she couldn’t hold the phone anymore. 

****

“Laura, Laura” her father bursts into her room with tears in his eyes  
“What happened dad? Why are you crying?” She asks. He didn’t say anything but hug her firmly  
“Laura-bear, The hospital called. They have a heart for you. Finally they got you a heart” he cries smiling.  
She had to sit on her bed. “OMG! I- I got a heart! A chance. Dad, I got a chance for a new life. A better life without oxygen tanks and hospital bed every week” she feels dizzy with excitement. When she started the day she didn’t expect this to happened but she’s so thankful she finally got a new opportunity to live without fear.  
“They said you need to take some exams but they’re ninety eight percent you’ll be compatible with the organ” he says “so go change and let’s go kid” he adds  
“I’m going down in a minute dad” she says while her father walks out through the door. As she gets ready her eyes go directly to a picture standing on her nightstand, she takes it.  
“You were right mom, I’d never give up and now I got it” her eyes watered “I wish you were here” she kisses the pictures “I missed you so much”

“Laura, are you ready?” Her father calls  
“Coming dad!” She says while walking down the stairs slowly 

****  
2 months after the accident 

“Are you sure you want to move to my apartment?” Asks her sister  
“There’s nothing left for me in my apartment” she answers  
“There’re memories Carm-“ Mattie starts  
“That’s why I can’t be there, there’re too many memories I can’t handle them anymore. Knowing she’s not there, her laugh won’t be heard anymore” her voice cracks “I won’t see her face again- and it’s all my fault-“ her sister interrupts  
“Carmilla, stop blaming yourself. It was that drunk man’s fault-“  
“She hadn’t been there if I wouldn’t have asked her to” Carmilla sobs “it doesn’t matter, I don’t wanna be there anymore” she finishes  
“You’ll always be welcome at my place...our place now on” Mattie hugs her sister and Carmilla holds on her tightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The songs in this chapter are:
> 
> “Je l’aime à mourir “ Frances Cabrel 
> 
> https://youtu.be/bMZVtFCU0ZQ
> 
> “Make you feel my love” Adele’s cover 
> 
> https://youtu.be/eU80eyfl-ao


	7. Chapter 7

While she was in the shower, she tried and tried to understand why her mind always went back to think about Laura. She chastises herself, no, she shouldn’t think about her, she should be thinking about Ell.  
When she was ready to go to her office her phone rings.

“Carmilla, where have you been? I’ve been trying to reach you all the morning” it’s the first thing her sister asks  
“I’m sorry I couldn’t answer earlier, I kinda overslept but I’m going now-“ she says, her sister changes her tone  
“Why don’t you take the day, kiddo? Maybe you need some time off from work” Mattie advices “maybe your body is telling it’s time to relax. After all, you’ve been working too much these months” she adds  
“Maybe you should go for a coffee. Maybe you can invite a new friend to refresh your morning...and I know who could be-“  
“Mattie” Carm warns  
“What? You need fresh air and talk to someone who doesn’t work with you or work for you” she says  
“And I’m sure I got the perfect choice...why don’t you ask Laura? She seems to be nice, you both can get to know each other” she concludes and Carm rolls her eyes  
“And since when you played Cupid Matska? Mayb-“ the older sister interrupts  
“Oh baby girl, I’ve never said something else than two people sharing some time together while drinking coffee, you may become friends” she can practically see her sister smirks right now and Carmilla frowns but can’t defend herself  
“I can’t do that- Ell-“ The young sister starts  
“Ell is not longer with us, Carm. You love her, I got that. She was someone important for you, of course she was. But you should stop letting the days passed. She asked you to enjoy life, she would be sad if she could see that you’ve been wasting your life just working” Mattie says  
“I know that, but it takes time to accept someone is gone when your body and your soul told you that you would be with that person forever” Carmilla says sincerely. Besides guilt is killing her, Ell shouldn’t have been there. She sighs  
“Let me tell you something Carm, rather than being sorry that you couldn’t have more time with her. I think you should be grateful that you had the time to share it with her” the older sister says “what I mean it’s that you two got the time to experience love, you both love each other so much and if you don’t want to enjoy your life, at least try to do it for her. It was the last thing she asked you” Mattie says “I don’t want to sound insensitive but maybe you need to have a closure so that you accept her death and also that it wasn’t your fault” Mattie concludes 

Her voice repeating on Carmilla’s mind. She knows Mattie is right, she got to let go Ell but how can she do that? How she let her go when she was the reason she died.

“But how?” Carm asks desperately  
“You know, I’ve seen a letter from the organ donation hospital. Maybe that is your sign to go and meet the person Ell saved. Because even if she’s not longer with us, part of her lives in another person, she gave them more time for having a normal life” Mattie says  
Carmilla turns to the desk and searches for the letter but couldn’t find it until she looks at the ground, she looks at the windows and both of them are closed. How did it felt down? She asks herself. Maybe as her sister says it’s a sign.

“I’ll try. But I don’t make any promises, this is hard for me Mattie” she answers  
“I know that kitty-cat” her sister says “but the first step is the hardest one” she adds 

/

Carmilla called to the hospital and they set an appointment with Dr. Roberts.  
“I can’t believe I’m about to do this” she mutters to herself taking some calming breaths  
“Miss Karnstein” a red haired woman with a light blue bottom up shirt and a black pencil skirt calls.  
She raised from her seat, as she’s approaching her hands get dampy, “try to control yourself Karnstein” she says in her mind. When she gets to the door, Dr. Roberts greets her

“Good afternoon Miss Karnstein” she extends her hand and shakes it.  
“Good afternoon Dr. Roberts” the dark haired answers, the doctor indicates her to sit in the chair in front of her. 

“May I know the reason you’re here?” She asks politely  
“Well I-“ Carmilla’s phone starts ringing “excuse me” she apologizes taking her phone and silences it.  
“Sorry, what I was saying is-“ it starts vibrating loudly in her pocket. Dr. Roberts raises an eyebrow.  
“Maybe you should answer it. It could be important” she says  
Carmilla takes it out of her pocket but she doesn’t recognize the number  
“I don’t think so. It’s a unknown number, I don’t answer those calls” she explains as she turns it off.  
“I apologize, I know you’re a busy. I’ll be brief. The hospital has been sending me some letters from the person who got my fiancée’s heart” She gulps and clears her throat “this person wrote that we could meet and talk but according to them, it would depend on me...I’ve been thinking and I’d like to do that. I’d like to meet them” her shining eyes turn to see the Doctor.  
“Okay, I can do that” she says as she takes some Kleenex and gives them to Carmilla, who takes one and dries the spilled tear on her left cheek.  
“May I have the name of your fiancée, please?” The doctor asks

“Her name was Ell. Ell Sheridan, she passed away on April 17, 2015” Carmilla’s voice sounds more like a whisper.  
The doctor starts searching the information on her laptop, then she turns to see the dark haired in front of her.  
“I found it, Miss Karnstein” she smiles “I’ll be in touch with the receiver and make an appointment. Is that okay?” She asks  
“Yes. I appreciate it” Carmilla answers while shaking the doctor’s hand  
“My pleasure” the doctor says

When she gets into her car, she stares at the wheel for a while, she couldn’t believe she did it. “I’m meeting the person who got it...shit, I’m meeting them” she says nervously hands on the wheel getting white by her hold on it. She blows her breath and starts the car.

/

She goes straight to home, she feels drained. She needs to think about the things she would say to this person. 

****

“...I think I could help you with that” Ruby says nodding.

“She’s not answering her phone” Laura whines while she goes back to the living room startling Ruby and Ell. “I can’t believe she’s not answering”  
Ell’s eyebrows shot up to her hairline, “really!” She asks “do you think I should go and find ou-“ she says but Laura’s phone starts ringing. The three of them turn to see it.  
“Laura, answer it. Maybe it’s her” says Ruby and Laura can’t help the feeling in her stomach. “No Hollis, this is not the time” she chastises herself  
“Uhm Hello?” She says. The call is from an unknown number, it’s not Carmilla’s number though.

“Good afternoon, I’m calling from the Organ and Tissue donation and transplant for Canadian blood services, I would like to talk with...Hollis. Laura Hollis” the voice says on the other side of the line.  
Suddenly she gets nervous, “Yeah, it’s me...I’m laura Hollis” she stutters.  
Ell looks concerned at Laura, she walks until she’s in front of her, making some signs to ask her if she’s okay. Laura nods but she knows she got paler. 

“Miss Hollis, I’m doctor Catherine Roberts. I’m the person in charge to collect and redirect the letters from the organ receiver to the organ donator’s relatives” she pauses “the relative of the person who donated the organ wants to make an appointment with you” her voice is calmed “she wants to know you. The reason of my call, besides letting you know this, is to ask you if you agree with the appointment so that I could make it happen” she comments  
“I-I’d like to do that” Laura says “when- when could that happen? I mean if it was on me we could meet right away. I’d like to tell her so many things” she starts but then she sees Ell’s face falling. Holy Hufflepuff, she forgot about what she’s doing now.  
“Miss Hollis, I don’t think the appointment will be right away. I just called you to make sure you don’t have any problems with it” the doctor says. “Now would it be okay for you to come to the hospital tomorrow at 2:30 pm. We will be waiting for you in the psychologist area, room 307. That’s my office. Now I’m calling the other party to let her know the date” she concludes.  
Laura’s emotions are like a roller coaster, she’s nervous but excited, happy but anxious, grateful but sad. Sad because this person lost a loved one.  
“I’ll be there. thank you, doctor Roberts” Laura says overwhelmed  
“My pleasure Miss Hollis. See you tomorrow then” she hangs up

“What happened?” Ell asks  
“It was a call from the hospital, they-“ she starts  
“Did something happen to your dad?” Ell asks, Laura always talked to her dad when she stayed with her. She knows Laura’s mom passed away many years ago.  
Laura shakes her head “No, it was-“ she’s interrupted by Ruby  
“Girls, are you gonna do small talk right now? We’re running out of time” she declares. Ell glares at her but then she remembers Ruby can’t see her, she rolls her eyes and turn to see Laura again. Ell doesn’t know why she feels like she needs to reassure Laura all will be okay. 

“I wish I could rub your back while telling you everything is going to be okay...” she says “but as I can’t touch you without hurting you or hurting myself” she looks at Laura eyes. Blue eyes looking tenderly to honey ones “everything is going to be okay, Laura. I’m sure it will” she smiles.  
“Thanks Ell” Laura says  
“Eh, Girls?” Ruby insists  
Both girls sigh. “let’s do this” says Ell 

****  
When she got home, someone is calling at the house’s phone. She picks it up and hear a voice that’s she knows very well

“Carm, where have you been? I was worried. Do you know your phone is off?” She says

She completely forgot she turned it off, her mind reliving the meeting with the doctor.  
“I’m sorry Mattie. I was in the hospital making an appointment with the organ receiver, We’ll meeting tomorrow afternoon” she explains  
She can hear Mattie sighs , “that’s good. You should talk to them, it would be a closure kitty-cat” she says  
“Yeah, I know that. But that doesn’t help this feeling in the pit of my stomach like I’m about to puke” she says sincerely  
“It’s normal to be nervous kid, you don’t have to pretend you’re not scared. Facing this may be the hardest thing you’ll do but it’s necessary” she says “I’m sure you’ll be alright after this Carm. You know you count on me so if you need to talk after that meeting...just call me. Well I gotta go back to work, see you later. ta-ta girl” Mattie says before hanging up 

Carmilla blows her breath and stares at the window, she can see the first star of the evening shining up in the sky, even though there’s still sunlight.  
Sleep comes easily when you’re tired, she thought about these days. First the presence of Ell by her side, then that feeling of emptiness, like she couldn’t feel Ell anymore, that thought frightens her. She may be able to talk to this person, to accept Ell is not coming back, to accept she won’t see her again. But she couldn’t accept the fact that Ell is dead because of her, that if Carmilla hadn’t asked her to pick her up. Then Ell would be alive. She feels guilty. She falls asleep thinking it’s all her fault.

/

Next morning:

Carmilla wakes up realizing that she fell asleep with her clothes again. She rolls her eyes at herself, when she gets to the kitchen the coffee is already made, Mattie is reading the newspaper while drinking her coffee.

“Good morning, little monster” Mattie greets “I was wondering what time you would get up. I saw your phone on the desk, it’s still off” she adds  
“Holy crap, I forgot to turn it on” she runs for it, taking it and getting back to the kitchen “Maybe the doctor called” she explains as she turns it on “Jesus! She called three times yesterday afternoon” Carmilla can’t believe her luck “I’m calling her” she dials Dr. Roberts immediately, she nervously bites her lip.

“Good morning, this is Dr. Roberts’ office how may I help you?” The doctor asks  
“Good morning Doctor Roberts, it’s Carmilla Karnstein. I’m afraid I couldn’t answer the phone yesterday, and I realized I had a few missed calls from you.” She says  
“Oh, Miss Karnstein. Yes, I was calling you to tell that the meeting will be at 2:30 pm today and it will be in my office but I would like to meet you earlier, would it be okay to meet you at 2:00 pm ” she asks  
“Sure, I- I’ll be there. Thanks Doctor” the black haired woman says  
“See you later, Miss Karnstein” the doctor says 

“What the doctor said? Is there any problem?” Mattie asks  
“No, she called me to tell me the meeting will be today’s at 2:30 but she wants me to get there earlier” she explains  
“Do you want to go with you? I can be your driver” Mattie says smiling  
“Would you do that for me?” Carmilla asks  
“Of course I’ll do that for you. I’ll do anything for you, Carmilla. You’re my favorite sister” Mattie says  
“Mattie, I’m your only sister” Carmilla giggles  
“One more reason to do anything for you, kiddo” she says trying to hold her laugh  
“Thanks Mattie. Thanks for always being there for me” Carmilla smiles 

****  
Previous night:

“I think I should go to see if something happened to her” Ell says exasperated “She always answers her phone. There must be something wrong” Ell adds nervously  
“I don’t think that would be a good idea” says Ruby for the hundredth time  
“And Why exactly was that a bad idea?” Ell asks frustrated  
Ruby rolls her eyes as if it was a silly question, “well every time you go and come back you’re losing the energy that makes you stay here. Duh!” She declares

“Say what again!”  
“She’s what?”  
Ell and Laura say at the same time.  
Ruby sighs, “Ell is attached to a specific energy here, in this case, her unresolved issues with Carmilla Karnstein. Ell must complete what she came back for, now she told me she’s being with Carmilla almost the entire time she’s been here. That’s why she hadn’t felt it yet, but when she was with Laura the first time she could be with her for how long? Three days? Five? A week? Then she was back with Carmilla. Even you guys are bonded and we haven’t figure out why only Laura can see her, the important thing is YOU” she points to Laura “to help Ell to communicate with her fiancée, and YOU” she points where she last listened Ell’s voice “to tell Carmilla what you need to. You shouldn’t waste your time here. Remember that this is not your world anymore” Ruby concludes leaving Laura and Ell stunned.

“It’s getting late Guys, I’m going but as soon as you two reach Carmilla, call me and we can do the ceremony. Is that okay?” The red haired says.

Both, Laura and Ell nod not knowing what to say.  
Ruby collects her things and get going back to her home. “See you later girls” she says before she goes

/

Laura thought she would be exhausted with everything that happened today. Everything she found out. However, she can’t fall asleep, thinking about what happened to Carm? Why didn’t she answer her phone? Why does she have a bond with Ell, when she never met her when she was alive. It doesn’t make any sense, so she grabs her laptop and starts surfing on the internet searching for any type of clue that helps her, it doesn’t matter if it’s one of those pages of esoteric topics. Hell, any clue would help her.

She realized she didn’t sleep when the birds start chirping, she looks at the time in her laptop and sees that indeed she hasn’t slept at all.  
She closes her laptop and goes to the kitchen to make some chocolate, she sees Ell lying on her couch. Do ghosts sleep? She asks to herself. “Ell” She calls but it’s almost a whisper “Ell, Ell, are you okay?” She asks this time louder than before. She’s about to touch her extending her hand she sees the charm on it. She takes it off and closes her eyes when she remembers she probably will feel the pain of the electricity as the others times. She doesn’t feeling it though, she wides her eyes getting worried and shakes Ell a little harder, “Ell please wake up!” She begs.

Ell stirred on the couch, “oh hey Laura, good mornin-“ she starts but stop talking when she sees Laura’s face. “Are you okay? What happened? You like you’re about to faint-“ she asks concerned but Laura hugs her hard.  
“Oh my god, Ell I thought you wouldn’t wake up, I was talking and you didn’t listen” Laura says exasperated  
“Laura, Laura...you’re touching me. You’re hugging me and there’s not spark. There’s not electricity” both looking each other surprised  
“This can’t be good, right?” Ell wonders  
“I’m afraid, it’s not a good sign” Laura says  
“I can’t go yet, I need to get Carmilla. ASAP” Ell’s voice crack “I’m not ready to go yet” she says  
“We’ll find a way to get Carmilla” reassures Laura

“In fact, I’m calling her right now” she says, she glances her watch it’s around 8:00 am. “She should be at work, right?” She thinks to herself  
She grabs her phone and dials Carmilla’s office. 

“Good morning, this is Carmilla Karnstein’s office. How may I help you?” She listens her friend’s voice  
“Hey Kirsch, I’m Laura. Is Miss Karnstein there yet? I’d like to talk to her, please” she says  
“Oh little hott-“ he falls silent “I mean, Miss Hollis. Yes, she’s here. Wait a minute please” he says and there’s some waiting music, Laura feels her heart in her throat.

“Good morning this is Miss Karnstein ” her raspy voice says and it’s impossible to avoid feeling the butterflies in her stomach  
“Mi-Miss Karnstein , it’s Laura Hollis here. I’d like to have a word with personally, please” She tries her hard not to stutter but she fails  
“Laura?” Carmilla’s surprised voice answers  
“Hey” She says and she wants to smack herself “I mean hello Carmilla” she looks at Ell and remembers why she was calling “as I said before, I’d like to talk to you. Carm” The endearment name slips her lips without permission. She could hear Carmilla holds her breath.  
“Did something happened with the apartment? Is there any problem with it?” Carmilla asks  
“As I said, I’d like to talk personally with you” she answers, she doesn’t want to lie so she chooses to be vague in her answers.  
“Okay, I have some meetings but I think we could meet around 5:00 pm. Is that okay for you?” Carmilla asks politely “would you rather come to the office or you want me to go to the apartment?” 

“If you come to my apartment it’s would be great” she says blushing  
“Okay, then I’ll see you later” says Carmilla  
“Yeah, later” says Laura before hanging up 

“She’s coming at 5” She says to Ell, who smiles  
“Laura” Ell says with a serious tone on her voice, it makes Laura turns quickly. Now that she can touch her, Ell holds Laura’s hand and say “I wanna thank you for doing all of this for me. You’re a good friend, you’re helping me without even knowing me. I will always be grateful, I will always remember what you’re doing for me” Ell hugs her. Laura feels guilty for feeling the butterflies every time she thinks/sees/hears Carmilla.  
“It’s okay. She says as she walks to shower and gets ready, “it’s gonna be a long day” she mutters

/ 

She’s feeling more anxious as the minutes pass, her leg bounces and it’s getting Ell nervous.

“What’s going on? Are you really nervous about the meeting today? Beca-“ Ell starts saying but she stops, remembering they never talked about the call Laura got from the hospital yesterday.  
“Laura, why did they call you from the hospital? We couldn’t have the chance to talk yesterday” she says  
Laura smiles excited “I’m nervous with our meeting with Carmilla. But one of the reasons I’m nervous too is that I have to go-“ she starts but suddenly stops when she sees Ell’s hands fading again  
“Ell-“ Laura yells  
“Oh no, oh no, oh no, it’s happening again. I’m coming back with Carm-“ Ell says before vanishes  
“Take care!” Laura says too late “take care?” She rolls her eyes. She sighs  
“Now I just have to wait until it’s time to go to the hospital” 

/

She gets there at 2:30 on the dot. Walking through the building she knows very well, until she is finally in front of room 307. She gulps and knocks

*knock, knock, knock* 

Someone opens the door, and look at her.  
“Hello, I’m Laura Hollis. I got an appointment at 2:30” her heart is beating fast she doesn’t know what she will say to the person on the other side. She practices all the morning but now she drew a blank.  
“Good afternoon, Miss Hollis. I’m doctor Roberts, nice to meet you” The doctor shakes her hand  
“Me too” she answers immediately  
The doctor pauses before she widen the door. Laura gets in, she could hear her beats in her ears.

“Let me introduce you to the donator relative...Miss Karnstein wanted to meet you” the doctor says.  
Laura snaps her head to where the black haired is, instantly looking at a pair of puffy red eyes. It can’t be, it’s “Carmilla” she gasps


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I’m really sorry I haven’t written in a while. As I said before this story is part of me, I was trying to find the right words to publish it.   
> Hope you like it so far.

It’s 1:30 when Mattie and her get into the car. Carmilla’s left leg is bouncing up and down, it’s getting Mattie crazy. She puts her hand on her sister’s leg making her stop bouncing.  
“I know you’re nervous about this but you should try to relax. Overthink the things won’t help you” Mattie advises   
“I can’t avoid doing it. I mean” she huffs some air “this person, this person is the one who has her heart. She’s still here in this person’s body. I can’t stop thinking about that” she says  
“This person is living because Ell was conscious that donating her organs would save lives. She gave this person the chance to keep going. To achieve their goals. To be happy” Mattie says “it’s admirable and altruistic, that’s why I think she would’ve liked you to go on with your life. She would love to see you happy.  
Ell was in the backseat, Mattie and her weren’t the best friends. Mattie was too confident and arrogant. But they both coincide that Carmilla deserves happiness. That made them got along for her.  
Listening those words makes Ell’s heart (well where her heart was supposed to be) swells.  
“so finally, Carmilla decided to meet that person” Ell says smiling.

They got to the hospital fast, “so do you want me to go there with you or you’d rather go by yourself? I can wait for you here” Mattie asks gingerly   
“I- would you mind waiting for me here?” Carm asks her sister  
“No at all. I’ll be here when you come back” Mattie answers

When Carmilla enters the hospital, the was a person playing the guitar to the patients.

“...When the evening shadows and the stars appear  
And there is no one there to dry your tears  
Oh, I hold you for a million years  
To make you feel my love” she sings

Carmilla wide her eyes and feel a tug in her heart, was this a sign? Then why did she feel that something’s off?   
No, she is overthinking probably. She knocks at doctor Roberts’ door waiting for her to open it.  
“Miss Karnstein, glad to see you” she shakes her hand. She seats in front of her desk, “I asked you to come earlier because there’re some things we need to discuss. I know this must be really difficult, even after this time. The reason why we ask the donator’s relatives and the receiver to meet here. It’s because the meeting could be confusing, a mixture of emotions that you will struggle with. You must know that this person is not the responsible of your relatives death-“ Doctor Roberts says but Carmilla interrupts her

“Of course not, I wouldn’t think that. Specially because I-“ she stops herself, she has never said those words aloud. Just to Mattie.   
The doctor raise an eyebrow, “Is there something you want to say, Miss Karnstein” Doctor Roberts asks. Carmilla is not sure if she should say it or not.

Ell has been there watching as Carmilla was trying to say what’s on her mind. “Come on Carm, just let her help you. You need to get that off your chest” she pleads 

“I- I think I’m responsible for Ell’s death” Carmilla blurts out. Wow she hasn’t said that out loud but she felt a weight left her shoulder “We were supposed to celebrate that night but I had to work so I asked her to pick me up...she was going to my office when she had the accident”

Carm feels her eyes burn but she couldn’t stop talking, she needed to face what she’d done.   
“Miss Karnstein, there’s no way you could know THAT would happen to your fiancée” Doctor Roberts says calmly “you must understand that your fiancée’s death is the result of a series of unfortunate events. It won’t do any good for you to blame yourself. The “what if” doesn’t exist, you’re here now and you should enjoy your life with no regrets” she adds  
“I want that- but I’d be enjoying life, the life Ell was denied. I can’t conceive that idea” Carmilla sighs

“Miss Karnstien, I’m sure you knew you’re fiancée pretty well. Would miss Sheridan want you to suffer for her? Would she rather see you sad all the time?” Doctor Roberts asks

“No, she would neve-“ Carmilla realizes what the doctor was implying “Ell would like to see me happy” Carmilla admits

“Of course I do. For Pete’s sake! I love you” Ell says exasperated 

“Then you should rethink about what you should be doing with your life. You may start enjoying it, one step at the time...if you need any help to deal with this situation, I’ll be happy to help you” the doctor says sincerely   
“Thank you Doctor, you have no idea how much I wanted to say this but it always got stuck in my throat. I feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders” she confesses   
“You can count on me if you want to talk. I’ll give you my card and we can make some sessions if you want to” the doctor says  
“I like th-“ Carmilla says But was interrupted 

knock, knock, knock 

“Hello, I’m Laura Hollis. I got an appointment at 2:30” Carmilla’s heart sinks when she hears that voice. “What is she doing here?” Carmilla thinks

“Good afternoon, Miss Hollis. I’m doctor Roberts, nice to meet you” She could hear the doctor’s voice far away like it was under the water.

“Me too” she hears the little blonde answers, she can’t move. She wanted to run, to yell, to cry, to do something. Did Laura know all of this and that was the reason she wanted to talk to her? Why didn’t she say something though? She thinks to herself.

The doctor opens the door. And Carmilla sees Laura gets in.

“Let me introduce you to the donator’s relative...Miss Karnstein wanted to meet you” the doctor says.  
Laura snaps her head to where she is sitting and their eyes lock.  
“Carmilla” Laura gasps   
“Laura” it’s the only word Carmilla manages to say   
“What the what?” Laura is paralyzed   
“I- I thought I was ready for this but- I gotta- I gotta get out of here” Carmilla stands up abruptly and passes by Laura’s side. “I’m sorry” she says before walking out the door  
“Carmilla wait!” Laura says

“Miss Hollis” says the doctor. Laura turns to see the doctor   
“May we have a word?” She nods   
“Miss Karnstein needs time and space. I have the impression that you both know each other” Doctor Roberts infers  
“Why- How- how do you know that?” Laura asks   
“Well I never said your name nor Miss Karnstein’s. Just your last names, but both of you call each other by your first name” doctor says  
Laura inhales sharply “well she sold me the apartment where I’m leaving now” and I can see her death fiancée who I was kinda helping   
to communicate with Carmilla, she wanted to say this but, as Doctor Roberts is a psychologist, she could send Laura to an asylum “we ran into each other a couple of times” she smiles awkwardly. 

****

Carm gets into the car hyperventilating, Mattie wides her eyes at the scene

“What happened? Why are you like that?” She asks desperately   
“Let’s go home, Mattie. I’ll tell you when I actually understand what just happened. Please just start the car and let’s go home” she begs  
“Okay” Mattie says

Carmilla levels her breath and relives what happened at the doctor’s office.  
“She- She was- she had it. All this time- she had it and I-“ Carmilla stutters “I don’t know if she knew it. Why did she want to talk to me personally later? She must’ve known- she-“ her eyes are filled with tears  
“Who’s she? Who are you talking about? Carmilla, look at me” Mattie says softly “please talk to me, you’re scaring me. What on earth happened in that office?” She inquires  
“Laura- Laura Hollis IS the organ receiver. She has Ell’s heart” Carmilla says exasperated   
“Miss Hollis?” It’s the only thing Mattie can say, she didn’t expect that.  
“Did She- was she aware that I was the donor’s relative? She wanted to meet me today, you know?” Carmilla spats   
“Carmilla, you need to calm down. I’m sure there’s a logical explanation for all this. You cannot judge Miss Hollis without listening to her. Probably this is an unfortunate coincidence” explains Mattie   
“I need some time to process this first” Carmilla answers 

/

“No, Laura. Miss Karnstein isn’t here. And please, please, please stop calling, I told you I’ll call you when she shows up here” Kirsch whispers/yells exasperated 

“It’s been a week, Kirsch. Hasn’t Mattie said something when you asked?” Laura asks  
“Little hottie, I’m gonna be in troubles if you keep calling” says kitsch “sorry I gotta go” he finishes the call

“Why is she doing this? She can’t just disappear instead of facing the truth-“ Laura complains “besides I didn’t know that. If I knew this maybe I’d had done something different specially this stupid cru-“ she sighs frustrated 

“Laura dear, people process grief in different ways. Confrontation may not be her strength. Besides for you, realizing that Ell was the donor hasn’t been a shocker. Because you can see Ell and you knew, in a way, that both of you are bounded” explains Perry.

****

“You’re getting on my nerves! I never thought I would say this but I don’t like what you’re doing!...this won’t help...Gee just stop it!” Ell yells pacing from forward to back

Carmilla is sitting on her bed in their department.

“I didn’t realize how much I missed this place” Carmilla says taking a gulp from the bottle of scotch. “There’re so many memories here. Ell, I miss you” another gulp “we couldn’t had the chance to get the happy ending” another gulp “and now- she has it, Why on earth does she have it? She, is that the reason she’s been in my mind all this time?” She takes another gulps before a sob scapes her mouth.

“I don’t know hon, Laura...if there’s something good about this is that she totally deserves a second chance and I’m happy she’s the one who got it” Ell says touching Carmilla’s shoulder. Once again her hand gets through her and Carmilla shivers.

“What the hell? I’m sure I turn on the heating” Carm thinks frowning. She doesn’t care though, she drinks more scotch.

“I need help here, I can’t do much by myself” Ell murmurs “I’m gonna have to do it”

She starts concentrating thinking about Laura, her place, her living room. Until she feels it and there she goes.

****

“Laura? Laura you should help me!” Ell yells “Laur- wait this isn’t Laura’s apartment” 

“Ell? What are you doing here? How did you get here?” Ruby asks

“That’s the same question I’m wondering. I was looking for Laura actually, I needed her help” comments the blonde 

“I can feel barely your energy, you shouldn’t have done that. If you do it one more time, you’ll disappear for good and it wouldn’t matter the bound you have with Laura” Ruby warns 

“This is important Ruby, I wouldn’t do if it weren’t” Ell sighs “Carmilla found out the reason Laura and I shared a bound. We actually share-“

“The heart she got from the transplant is yours” Ruby finishes

“How did you-“

“Well it was a little obvious, I thought you already know it” Ruby shrugs 

“I didn’t- we- Carmilla didn’t take it well. She thinks Laura knew all this and that was the reason she wanted to talk to her, but Laura wanted to talk about me being here” explains the ghost

“So she doesn’t know that yet. And you’re disappearing, I can feel you’re getting weaker. I think it’s time we go to Carmilla’s apartment and get this over” Ruby says holding a necklace with a triangle on it.

“What about Laura? Doesn’t she have to be there? I mean she wanted to help too” Ell says

“We’ll call her on the way there” Ruby says “now, tell me the address and let’s go”

****

“Hello Kirsch? Did she show up-“ 

“I ain’t Kirsch, hey Laura it’s me, Ruby. Do you remember me? I’m Perry’s cousin” the red haired comments

“Ruby? Yeah, hey. How did you-?”

“I got your phone number from Ell, she’s with me right now. We’re gonna need your help” Ruby says with a worried tone

“Ell? Wasn’t she supposed to be with Carmilla? Did something happen?” Laura asks 

“We’re doing an intervention to Carmilla and we may need your bound with Ell. She needs more energy now that she’s getting weaker. Could you help her?” Ruby asks

“Yes, of course! Just tell me what to do and I’ll help” Laura says 

****

*KNOCK* *KNOCK* *KNOCK*

“Who the frilly hell?” Mumbles Carmilla while she tries to get up, she finished that bottle of scotch and everything is moving around her right now.

*KNOCK* *KNOCK* *KNOCK*

“Who the hell knocks like tha- who the hell are you?” The dark haired asks 

“Oh, hey you must be Carmilla” the red haired comments

“Must I be?” The dark haired raises an eyebrow 

Looking at her intently, Ruby realizes Carmilla is wasted. Her hair is disheveled and probably she hasn’t taken a shower in a few days.

“Hey, you may not know me but I’d like to talk to you. It’s something important” Ruby says “my name is Ruby by the way”

“Ruby? I don’t remember anyone with that name” Carmilla hiccups 

“I see, you may need a coffee” Ruby advices 

“Wha- I don’t need a coffee, I’m pretty well right now. Why don’t you tell me what do you want?” Carmilla asks exasperated 

“Ell was right you’re too stubborn. Why don’t we make some coffee so we can deal with this” Ruby rolls her eyes while getting inside the apartment

“Wait- did you know Ell?” Carmilla closes the door as she follows Ruby inside the living room 

/

“Okay, we’ve already drank the coffee and I’m waiting for the answer...so where did you meet Ell? How did you get to know each other? How is it possible I hadn’t heard from you in all this time?” She asks 

“What will you say to her? She wouldn’t believe you if you tell her I’m a ghost” Ell says

“Okay, Carmilla. I will need you to have an opened mind with this one” Ruby starts

“So YOU are telling the truth” gasps Ell 

Ruby sighs, “the reason I’m about to tell you all these things is because you need to know them before it’s too late. So please, be patient and let me finish the whole story, okay?” 

Carmilla frowns at that statement, she’s curious to understand why this person is so convinced she wouldn’t let her finish.

“Okay, just spit it out!” Carmilla says 

“If you tell her, try to be subtle so she would be understanding” advices Ell 

Ruby clears her throat and takes a deep breath “so your ex fiancée came back from the other side to get her closure, she tried to communicate with you but you couldn’t feel her. That until she met Laura and after a lot of insistence from Ell, who by the way is as stubborn as you, Laura accepted to get to know you so that she could tell you that Ell wanted to talk to you but then when she touched you for the first time she felt the sparks that usually are shared by soulmates only, you probably felt it with Ell when you first met. Maybe that was the reason she got a crush on you, actually I don’t know that...but then you both went to that appointment at the hospital and you realized Laura was the receiver of Ell’s heart and Laura realized the bound she has with Ell and the reason she could see her, but now the bound it’s too weak, that’s the reason Ell couldn’t get back to Laura to ask for help when you got drank in here. For some reason she went to my place even though she hasn’t been there and she lost too much energy. I can barely feel her, so she-“ she got interrupted by a red face dark haired

“Stop! Why are you saying those things? You don’t know what respect mean. You’re talking about my dead fiancée like she’s still here, how dare yo- HOW DARE YOU!” Carmilla yells

“Holy smokes! She’s furious, I told you to be subtle! You can’t spills the beans like that” Ell says worried 

“Who sent you? Who would take my pain and make it a circus? Is this Laura’s idea? Why would she do that?” Carmilla’s voice cracks

“No, Carmilla. It’s not like that, I wish I could be subtler but I can’t we’re running out of time and there’re more things you need to know-“ Ruby starts

“The only thing I know it’s I don’t want to hear you anymore, get out of my house because I call the police” she warns 

“We’re so doomed” Ell deflates

But Ruby is not the kind that leave without a fight. “Okay, listen if I prove Ell is with us, will you hear me out?” Ruby asks

“I don’t want to hear you anymore-“ Carmilla says

“Quickly tell me something just you both could know!” Inquires Ruby looking at the door where she heard Ell last time 

“She works with her sister Matska, they’re best friends” Ell says

“You’re getting weaker, no I can barely hear you” Ruby says with worried eyes, she turns to see Carmilla 

“You worked with you sister Matska Who is your bff” Ruby says looking Carmilla in the eyes

“Everyone knows that” Carmilla smirks

“Tell her she’s the only one who calls her Mattie. Except for Laura now” Ell whispers, she began to tremble and she can’t see her hands anymore 

“You were the only one who calls her Mattie”

“I AM the only one who call her like that” her smirk widen

“...except for Laura” Ruby says 

Carmilla had a flashback of the day Mattie asked Laura to call her Mattie too.

“That can’t be, were you following us? Is Laura your accomplice in this? Why are you doing this?” Carmilla’s red eyes are the prove how much this is hurting her

“Carm, just listen to her for a moment” Ell begs but she can’t move from where she is standing.

“Ell, Try to prove her you’re here with us” Ruby asks

“I...move...Can’t...walk” Ruby hears, she is aware Ell doesn’t have more energy to elaborate movements nor sentences 

“I guess I’m by myself now” she mumbles 

“Why don’t you answer me? Is this some kind of fraud where you ask for money ‘to help’ me communicate with my fiancée?” Carmilla asks making quotation marks with her hands

*knock* *Knock* *Knock*

“Now what?” The dark haired ask exasperated as she opened the door

“Oh hey Carm...illa ho- how are you?” Smiles awkwardly Laura 

“You? Now what do you want? Why are you doing this?” Carmilla exclames 

“Lau...ra” Laura turns to the side of the room where Ell is lying on the floor.

“Oh my god! What happened?” Laura passes beside Carmilla to get on her knees to touch Ell 

“What the hell?” Carmilla slams the door once everyone apparently can come inside her place. “What are you doing? Are you praying or something?” She asks getting near Laura 

“It’s E-“ Laura stops herself, she doesn’t know how much Carmilla knows about Ell and her.

“Just tell her. I’ve told her everything but I can’t feel Ell anymore” Ruby sighs 

“What? You’ll tell me Ell is here too?” Carmilla frowns “how can you play with this? I don’t deserve this Laura” she complains 

“It’s not a lie, Carmilla. Ell, she’s here with us. She needs you- before she can pass” Laura explains

“I don’t have any more energy Laura, please take care of Carmilla. She, she will understand with the time. Just be patient with her” Ell exhales

Laura holds her as she starts trembling. “No, you’ll tell her. Don’t die. She can’t die right?” She asks Ruby 

“She wasted too much energy all this time she couldn’t get in touch with Carmilla. It’s her time to move on” Ruby sighs

“Wait! Are you for real? Ell is here?” Carmilla take a step back shaking her head

“It’s what I’ve said as I came here” Ruby rolls her eyes

“But- that can’t be- she can’t- I mean that is...impossible” Carmilla denies it

“What- what can we do? She can’t go without finishing her goal” Laura exclaims

Ruby thinks deeply and without warning takes Laura’s hand and pulls her up 

“What the- What” Laura says surprised 

“Come here” Ruby demands, then points to Carmilla and says “you bring salt, all the salt you have in your kitchen!” 

“What-why-“ 

“We have no time to explanations” Ruby exclaims

Carmilla runs to the kitchen to bring all the salt, she doesn’t know if it’s the look in those girls who makes her believe it or she wants to believe them but she’s doing it because she wants to find out the truth.

“Here, this is all I have” she says as she comes back from the kitchen 

“Give it to me” Ruby starts to make a circle in the floor with it.

“Spiritus coniuncta, praetrunco. Reditum uievit, reditum somnus, redditum sanguis” She says as she finishes the circle in the floor. She starts to make a pentagram inside the circle as she repeats this conjuring for a second time.

“Spiritus coniuncta, praetrunco. Reditum uievit, reditum somnus, redditum sanguis” she yells “Laura, you need to stand in here. Come on!” 

“Ok-Okay” Laura says as she runs to the stand up inside the circle

“Take this” Ruby hands her a necklace with a ruby on it. “Hold it and don’t let it go” the red haired advices. Then she turns to Carmilla   
“You come here and take this” she gives her a little triangle stone with a hole in the middle of it. 

“Is this a loupe or something?” Carmilla asks in disbelief 

“No, it’s part of a ouija board. If you take a look with it on your eyes, you’ll see the undead” she explains 

Carmilla gulps but holds it anyway, the lights start to flicker and a scream makes Carmilla shivers as she turns to see Laura in pain.

“What’s going on? What’s happening?” She asks

“Use the triangle, now” Ruby commands

“What on earth-“ she gasps


	9. Chapter 9

“What on earth-?” She says as she puts the triangle near her left eye.  
There she was, Ell taking Laura’s place on the circle, emanating a gold light around her. 

“Where’s Laura? What happened?” She asks desperately 

“She’ll be okay. Now you have to let Ell say what she must before she moves on” Ruby says calmly. Carmilla nods 

“E-Ell?” She whispers unsure if her eyes are deceiving her “is that you?” She asks 

Ell opens her eyes and see Carmilla, realizing Carmilla can see her now. She widen her eyes 

“Can you- do you see me?” She asks as some tears blur her eyes 

“I-I do. Oh gosh! It’s you” Carmilla answers as she gets close to her fiancée 

“Ell, I don’t want to be mean but You should say what you need to, I don’t know how strong is your bound right now and my magic won’t last much longer” Ruby warns 

“Okay, Okay. Carm, I want to tell you, I love you. God, I love you so much. You should know that, you’re the love of my life, you changed my life and I wanted to be a better person everyday so that I could deserve you...” Ell says as she starts crying “you deserve the entire world, you’re the best person I’ve met and, and you should be happy...the reason I came back was that you couldn’t move on and I just couldn’t see you suffering for me, you deserve to be happy” Ell explains 

“How can I? You were the reason I was happy, you made me feel worthy” Carmilla explains as she get closer to Ell 

“You are worthy Carm. You don’t need to depend your happiness on me. I’m sure you’ll find the way to be happy without me, I know you won’t forget me and I’m not asking you that. As I won’t forget everything we’ve been through, but you need to embrace those memories and create others with the people around you...and maybe-“ Ell sighs “maybe you find someone else to be happy with too” 

“I- that won’t happen. Ell, I don’t want to do that. If there’s someone else it would be like cheating on you” Carmilla says 

“It wouldn’t, love” Ell sighs exaggerated. she wants Carmilla to understand what she means. 

“Just imagine if the role were reversed, wouldn’t you like me to be happy? Would you rather seeing me alone and miserable or getting my life together and being happy?” She asks 

“Of course I like you to be happy” Carmilla answers truthfully 

“Then why don’t you do the same?” The blonde asks 

“I-I can’t-“ Carmilla says 

“Yes, you can. Just- just give yourself a chance to be happy again. You don’t have to punish yourself for things that aren’t your fault. Shit happens Carm. Unfortunately it happened to me.” Ell comments “but the good thing about this is that I could safe Laura, she got her second chance and believe me she deserves it” 

“She’s a good person. I know she deserves it. It’s just- she reminds me so much to you. And now I know why” Carmilla confesses 

“The fact that we share a heart doesn’t mean she’s me, love. I think you like her because she’s gentle and kinda adorkable...I wouldn’t be happier if you two become friends” Ell says 

Carmilla smiles at her fiancée “you always see good things about everything” Carmilla touches Ell’s cheekbones. “And you’re right, it’d be great if she and I become friends” 

The lights of the room start flickering again and the window opens making the wind blows the circle of salt.  
Ruby runs to close the window, “ guys you gotta be quicker, otherwise you won’t have time” She warns 

“Remember, last time we talked and I said to you that I always wanted to dedicate a song-“ Ell starts 

“When the rain is blowing in your face  
And the whole world is on your case  
I could offer you a warm embrace  
To make you feel my love” Carmilla starts singing it, reliving all the memories she had with Ell 

“When the evening shadows and the stars appear  
And there is no one there to dry your tears  
Oh, I hold you for a million years  
To make you feel my love” Ell keeps singing trying to hold back the tears 

“I know you haven't made your mind up yet  
But I will never do you wrong  
I've known it from the moment that we met  
No doubt in my mind where you belong” Carmilla’s voice cracks 

“I'd go hungry; I'd go black and blue  
And I'd go crawling down the avenue  
No, there's nothing that I wouldn't do  
To make you feel my love” Ell touches Carmilla’s cheeks as she starts caressing them 

“The storms are raging on the rolling sea  
And on the highway of regret  
The winds of change are blowing wild and free  
You ain't seen nothing like me yet  
I could make you happy, make your dreams come true  
There's nothing that I wouldn't do  
Go to the ends of this Earth for you  
To make you feel my love” Carmilla holds Ell’s face as they both start closing the gap between them. 

“oh yes  
To make you feel my love” Carmilla finishes the sentences before their lips met, the kiss is slow as if they wanted to memorize it. As they’re trying to show how much love they have for each other, Carmilla takes a step further and holds Ell by the waist as Ell caress her fiancée nape. 

And for a minute, there wasn’t sadness or loneliness. There wasn’t dead fiancées or unfinished business. Just two people in love sharing in a kiss everything they feel for each other, with plenty of time to show it. And for a minute, they were sure this wouldn’t end. But life isn’t that perfect and reality hits them as the window was opened again by a cold wind that erased the circle, they shared a brief kiss as Ell says “I love you” before Carmilla opens her eyes and realizes she was kissing Laura Hollis instead of Ell. 

“I love you” she whispers “I always will” 

As they keep in position, they felt a little spark that makes them jump far from each other. Looking awkwardly at each other, Laura blushing asks 

“What happened? Why were we-“ she trails off 

“Don’t you remember?” Carmilla asks 

“Well, she was the medium to communicate with you. She wasn’t here when all that happened” Ruby explains “now, if you let me gather my things and I’ll leave you to talk about this” she smiles as she takes the stone triangle from Carmilla and her necklace from Laura. 

“I’ll leave you to talk. Was a pleasure to meet you, Carmilla.” She turns to see Laura “see ya, Hollis”   
And there goes Ruby, smiling all the way to home. Happy she could help not just the ghost but the ghost’s fiancée and the receiver. 

“Oh man, I should write a book. This is good material” she thought as her phone rings 

“Hello?” She answers 

“Oh hey Ruby, it’s me. Claire, I forgot my keys before the trip, would you come home please?” The voice of the roomie and bestie sound at the other side of the phone 

“Claire! How is your baba? Oh I gotta tell you everything I’ve seen this days. I’m going home ASAP” Ruby says happy to have her friend back 

At the same time, Carmilla and Laura didn’t know how to start that awkward conversation of how they shared a kiss without know it. 

“Sooo” says Carmilla 

“Soooo” repeat Laura 

**** 

“Hey Ell, I know I promise to come yesterday but I couldn’t. I completely forgot about the appointment with Dr. Roberts, she’s been my therapist for these six months. She says I’m opening up and that a good sign.   
I think Laura has a lot to do with it, your were right and we are good friends. Although we’re totally different we get along pretty well. I don’t like the red beanpole she has as a friend though, she patronizes Laura too much. Sometimes I want to ask her to back up but Laura is an independent woman who can do it by herself and she does it. I don’t know but I have this need to protect her...and I know what you would say and let me tell you what you think it’s happening, it’s not happening. We’re just friends, ok?” She clears her throat “let’s change topics, I quit my job and I get back to study photography. I realized that I have to do what I love and I love taking pictures. And you know what, You remember I told you about my big puppy that I used to have as an assistant, we kinda become friends. He’s not that bad actually. Mattie went to open a new office mother has in Morocco, she loves it so I’m happy for her even though I couldn’t get to see her often now. Well Ell, I’ll be coming soon to tell you more about what happens here...love you” Carmilla says as she rearranged the bouquet of flowers she brought to the cemetery. 

“Hey Carm, I thought I could come to visit Ell too. She was a good friend with me” Laura says as she approaches her 

“Hey Laura, I was about to leave actually. If you want to have some privacy I can let you to talk to her-“ she starts 

“That is not necessary. I think I told you everything Ell and I did. Including the singing in my apartment part and the time we had an argument and people though o was crazy” she recalls smiling now at the memory 

“Yeah I remember that” Carmilla smiles 

Laura smiles too before turning to see the stone grave. “You know I’ve been missing you since you left” she starts “we don’t have so much time, but you show me you’re one of the best people I’ve ever met. You thought me a lot of things Ell, one of them is to stop worrying me about everything, I shouldn’t be afraid of things happening. And enjoy life, now more than ever because this is my second chance. You save me in many ways Ell” her voice cracks “Thank you for everything you did for me, specially for this” she touches her heart “I’ll take care of it like what it is. A treasure...and I’ll take care of Carm too, don’t worry I won’t let her brood too much” she smiles 

“Hey! I don’t brood, I think profoundly with a frown in my face...just that” Carmilla smirks 

“I’ll come soon with flowers I promise” Laura says. She turns around to see her friend 

“Why don’t we grab some food and watch something. I’ll let you show me that series you wanted me to watch” Carmilla says 

“Ohh We can watch Buffy or Jessica Jones or Veronica Mars. Or or I get it, let’s watch Dr. Who!” Says Laura excited 

“Oh-oh you know what I take it back let go to walk” Carmilla deadpans 

“Oh nonononono you already say yes. You can take it back” Laura complains 

“Yes I can” 

“No you can’t” Laura says 

Carmilla turns around as a shiver runs her spine. Nothings but the cool breeze greets her. “I’ll see you, Ell” she whispers.


End file.
